GOOD THINGS
For Marion Marshall ā and The Girls
Good Things was first performed by Borderline Theatre Company, in association with the Byre Theatre, St Andrews and Perth Theatre, at the Tron Theatre, Glasgow on Thursday 16 September 2004.
The production then toured to Eastgate Theatre and Arts Centre, Peebles; Barrfields Theatre, Largs; Howden Park Centre, Livingston; Lochside Theatre, Castle Douglas; Falkirk Town Hall; MacRobert Theatre, Stirling; Gaiety Theatre, Ayr; Arts Guild Theatre, Greenock; Carnegie Hall, Dunfermline; Eden Court Theatre, Inverness; Cumbernauld Theatre; Brunton Theatre, Musselburgh; The Palace, Kilmarnock; Byre Theatre, St Andrews and Perth Theatre.
The cast was as follows:
ACTRESS ONE (SUSAN) | Annette Staines |
ACTOR ONE (DAVID) | Vincent Friell |
ACTRESS TWO (MARJORIE, DORIS, et al) | Molly Innes |
ACTOR TWO (FRAZER, TONY, et al) | Kenneth Bryans |
Director | Maureen Beattie |
Designer | Finlay McLay |
Lighting Designer | Simon Wilkinson |
Thanks to Eddie Jackson at Borderline for the imaginative and exceptionally extensive series of workshops on this script and to all the different actors and directors who contributed at various times.
Liz Lochhead
Characters
SUSAN LOVE, forty-nine played by ACTRESS ONE
DAVID, fifty-one played by ACTOR ONE
SCOTCH DORIS, sixty-ish
CHERYL, forty-ish
MARJORIE, forty-five-ish
WELL-DRESSED WOMAN
NATALIE, thirty-two
SHARP YOUNG POLICEWOMAN
HELENA, twenty-two
all played by ACTRESS TWO
FRAZER, forty-ish
ARCHIE, eighty-four
TONY, fifty-ish
SCRUFFY LITTLE MAN, sixty
FLOWER DELIVERY MAN
INSENSITIVE POLICEMAN
all played by ACTOR TWO
āScotch Dorisā is Scottish, obviously, and has a lot of strongly idiomatic dialogue, but ā this is entirely optional ā Susan could well be too, albeit with only a Scots accent on her perfectly standard English vocabulary and syntax.
The town, or big city suburb, could be anywhere, but the scene is the little charity shop on the corner ā very much Frazerās designer-palace ā on three different days in one year.
There should be as miraculous and swift a transformation as possible between Act One, 6 January, and Act Two, Valentineās Day.
Act Three should have a very different Christmas tree and decorations from Act One.
Possibly on one of the three days (perhaps Act One?), it is pouring with rain outside, and people come in from the outside wet. A cold dry bright winterās day for Act Two would therefore contrast beautifully.
ACT ONE
TWELFTH NIGHT
Music: āTime is On My Sideā (Rolling Stones), loud.
6 January. A little charity shop on the corner. The rather spectacular Christmas decorations are more than half down but a last section on one side is very much still to do. Thereās the A-frame of an open step-ladder and under it a full box spilling gorgeously coloured tinsel.
Stage right, on the back wall, there is a doorway to backshop with a door, currently closed, clearly marked āPrivateā.
Stage left, on the back wall, behind a single full-length front curtain, currently closed, there are two slightly angled, adjoining, tiny changing-room spaces, each with a curtain stopping well short of the floor, which shows the legs and feet, though covers the heads, if and when the long front curtain is open.
The shopās front door entrance/exit from street is stage left.
FRAZER, a dapper man in early middle age and SUSAN, attractive, warm, likeable, youthful-looking for her late forties, stand near each other, poised. FRAZER is looking at his watch, waiting for the second hand to reach the twelve. He points at SUSAN: Go! SUSAN takes a deep breath, then ā
SUSAN. Okay, what Iāll say, Iāll say: Susan. Friendship. Friendship and fun really. Nothing too serious! Susan Love ā
(But you know, Frazer, Iām seriously thinking of reverting to my maiden name, only Iāve not used it for so long ā obviously itās not me, though what is? I mean, there could be pluses, well, in the self-esteem department? I suppose.)
My counsellor suggested it, that the time would come I might feel that taking back my own name would be appropriate ā not that I go in much for therapy or counselling or stuff ā but he was helpful. Definitely.
I thought, avail yourself of everything, Susan, everything thatās going ā and it was part of a package at work, my friend Mel thatās just moved to Macclesfield with her husband, she recommended it, she said, āSusan, see a counsellor, I would, itās free, thereās no shame, did wonders for me with that second miscarriage before little Benny was born when I just couldnāt see light at the end of the tunnel, heās very good, he helps you get in touch with your feelings.ā
I said, āMel, Iāve got no problem feeling my feelings, I wish I could stop feeling them, Iām awash with the bloody things.ā She said, āI know but he helps you accept your grief and move through it, realise youāre not always going to feel like this and, well, put it in perspective sort of thing. You knowā¦ grieve and move on?ā
I said, āI donāt know if griefās what Iād call it exactlyā but ā he helped! Oh, it was only the six free sessions, no way would I or could I ever get into that sort of self-indulgence and expense long-term.
And Iām fine. Dāyou know, eighteen months on, some days I feel quite excited. Exhilarated. A clean slate. Hence ditch the Love, though why should I change the person Iāve been for the last twenty-four years because my husband ups sticks? And itās my daughterās name, so Iām probably stuck with Love for the duration.
FRAZER (tapping watch, cāmon!). Sus-ann!
SUSAN. Right what? Godā¦ My interests? Macrame, origami and aqua-nooky!
Wellā¦ Music. All sorts. Stones, Sinatra, Springsteen, Sibelius. Ella, anybody good! Except folk. Folk or jazz. Canāt stand jazz, too jangly. Nor can I abide dance or house or rap. None of the stuff that our Stephi drives me up the wall with. Easy listening? I find that hard to take.
Love going to the pictures! Just about anything. Old black-and-whites on the telly on a Sunday afternoon ā
FRAZER. Timeās up.
SUSAN. Really? Thatās what Iām afraid of. Game over.
FRAZER. Why?
SUSAN. Past it. Thatās me! Most probably. Face it, Frazer, Iām forty-eight, forty-nine in February.
FRAZER. Yes, but you donāt need to tell them that!
SUSAN. Why not? Itās the truth. This year Iāll be hitting my fiftieth year.
FRAZER. Is fifty not supposed to be the new thirty?
SUSAN. ā The full half-century. How the hell did that happen?
DORIS, a regular, sixty-ish, known as āScotch Dorisā, sticks her head round one side of the changing-room areaās front curtain.
DORIS. You donāt look it, darlinā. Do you have this in a size bigger?
FRAZER. Perhaps āmodomā would prefer it in the aubergine? This is a charity shop, Doris! All one-offs, obviously. Duh!
DORIS sweeps the front curtain wide open and emerges. She looks a fright in whatever (much too tight).
Stage-right cubicleās short curtain is shut, no legs showing in there, itās clearly empty. DORISās ...