Duck (NHB Modern Plays)

Stella Feehily

• Publisher: Nick Hern Books
• Year: 2016
• ISBN:
  9781780017488
• Topic: Literature
• Subtopic: Drama
• Index: Literature

A sparky and moving first play about female friendship, premiered by Out of Joint Theatre Company, directed by Max Stafford-Clark.

Cat and Sophie are Dublin teenagers on the brink, growing up in the face of everything a city can throw at them. How can you learn to be good when your elders are no longer your betters? Somehow, the girls must cope - or find a way of escaping.

'without doubt an adrenaline rush, a hyperventilating hymn to the age of the angry young woman' - Evening Standard

'A thrilling debut' - Sunday Times

Scene One

Late night. A deserted side street illuminated by a street lamp.

A huge explosion. Sounds of running. Car alarms. Sirens in the distance,

CAT (late teens) runs on. She is wearing a very short skirt and has a sparkly handbag slung over her shoulder. She has a bottle of Bacardi Breezer in one hand and a car wing-mirror in the other.

She is very drunk. Her face is streaked with mascara. She has stopped to catch her breath and have a drink.

From offstage SOPHIE (late teens) is shouting.

SOPHIE. Cat, Cat,

Stop / For fuck’s sake

Wait.

SOPHIE runs in with one of her spindly high heels in her hands. She is similarly drunk. She is out of breath.

CAT. Alright /

I’ve stopped.

SOPHIE. Fucking strap broke when I was legging / it down Waterloo Road.

Probably got rabies now

SOPHIE throws down the broken shoe, wipes her foot with her hand and puts the shoe on.

CAT has sunk to the ground and is singing unintelligibly her own version of The Hives ‘Hate To Say I Told You So’.

Don’t go whacko on me now.

What have you done?

You’re lucky to be alive.

CAT. Think I’m gonna be sick.

She falls to her hands and knees and makes noises like she’s going to be sick.

SOPHIE. You all right?

CAT. Mark hates my feet.

SOPHIE. What?

CAT. Says I could have been a duck.

Sick / fuck.

Feel worse.

She leans over clutching her stomach.

SOPHIE. Are you going to get sick? Will I hold your hair back?

CAT. No. I’ll do it myself. (She tries to get sick.)

So stupid.

SOPHIE. You’re pissed.

CAT. No shit.

Got a stitch too.

SOPHIE. Sit down then.

CAT. Yes sir.

SOPHIE. I thought you were going to let the air out of his tyres / or something?

CAT. I surprised myself.

SOPHIE. You me and the people with their windows blown in.

What exactly did you do?

CAT. Stuffed me cardie down the petrol thing, stuck a lighter under it.

SOPHIE. Fucking hell.

CAT. Bob’s your uncle, Fanny’s your aunt, it lit in a shot./

Fucking bastard.

SOPHIE. Jesus Christ.

CAT. His petrol cap wasn’t on properly./

And I couldn’t help myself.

SOPHIE. I’m shocked. I’m in shock.

CAT. Nearly did a Joan Of Arc.

SOPHIE. I can’t believe it.

CAT (putting her head in her hands). Oh God. (Half laughing.)

SOPHIE. Tina Roddy’s dad set fire to his girlfriend’s house.

CAT. Oh yeah?

SOPHIE. He went to prison.

CAT. Don’t care.

SOPHIE. They’ll throw you into prison.

CAT. Not gonna get caught.

SOPHIE. You hope.

CAT. Three fucking hours.

SOPHIE. What?

CAT. Left me in Beirut.

SOPHIE. Huh?

CAT. He just doesn’t think.

SOPHIE. What?

CAT. I hate it.

Doesn’t understand. Do this, do that. No you fuckers.

Bastard./

It’s no fun anymore in The Near East.

SOPHIE. You better come back to mine.

CAT. It’s wheeee . . . Out of control.

SOPHIE. It’s arson. Do you understand?

CAT. Expecting, always expecting . . .

SOPHIE. Stop it Cat. Come on.

Get it together . . . please.

CAT. Destroys me.

SOPHIE. We need to get home.

CAT. Did you hear the explosion? (She giggles.)

SOPHIE. You’ve gone completely mental.

CAT. I could have any man I wanted. (She tries to get sick.)

SOPHIE. Right. Get up. / You’ve got to start walking ok?

CAT. Ok ok bossy lady. Just wait until those people pass.

I might fall over. (She giggles.)

Two inner city lads approach from offstage. They strut over.

BOY 1. A regular little party going on here, wha?

BOY 2. Are youse queers?

CAT. No.

BOY 2. What are youse all cosied up here for?

CAT. My friend was comforting me.

BOY 1. Awwww, Would ya comfort me, would ya?

SOPHIE. Right, you can get lost now.

CAT. Yeah, fuck off out of my face.

BOY 2. They look like queers to me. (To BOY 1.) What do you think?

...

Table of contents

• Cover
• Title page
• Contents
• Original Production
• Dedication
• Characters
• Duck
• About the Author
• Copyright and Performing Rights Information