- 480 pages
- English
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The Innocents Abroad
About This Book
Set in 1867, The Innocents Abroad is a travel book that follows a group of Americans from New York City to the renowned Holy Land. Throughout the journey, author Mark Twain uses humor and wit to make astute observations about the diverse people and legendary locales.
Described as the "Great Pleasure Excursion, " Twain and his traveling companions visit some of the most illustrious cities in the world. They make stops in Italy, France, and Greece as well as modern-day Israel and Ukraine. With each trip, the author notes the contrast between expectation and reality. He critiques the misrepresentation of cultural sites and events with notable irony and disillusion.
The retelling of a worldly expedition through an American lens made > The Innocents Abroad a massive commercial success. It's one Twain's best-selling books and became a staple within the travel genre. Readers will thoroughly enjoy the author's enlightening take on the Old World and public perception.
With an eye-catching new cover, and professionally typeset manuscript, this edition of The Innocents Abroad is both modern and readable.
Since our inception in 2020, Mint Editions has kept sustainability and innovation at the forefront of our mission. Each and every Mint Edition title gets a fresh, professionally typeset manuscript and a dazzling new cover, all while maintaining the integrity of the original book.
With thousands of titles in our collection, we aim to spotlight diverse public domain works to help them find modern audiences. Mint Editions celebrates a breadth of literary works, curated from both canonical and overlooked classics from writers around the globe.
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Table of contents
- Cover
- Title Page
- Copyright
- Contents
- Preface
- 1. Popular Talk of the ExcursionâProgramme of the TripâDuly Ticketed for the ExcursionâDefection of the Celebrities
- 2. Grand PreparationsâAn Imposing DignitaryâThe European ExodusâMr. Blucherâs OpinionâStateroom No. 10âThe Assembling of the ClansâAt Sea at Last
- 3. âAveragingâ the PassengersâFar, far at Sea.âTribulation among the PatriarchsâSeeking Amusement under DifficultiesâFive Captains in the Ship
- 4. The Pilgrims Becoming DomesticatedâPilgrim Life at SeaââHorse-BilliardsââThe âSynagogueââThe Writing SchoolâJackâs âJournalââThe âQ. C. ClubââThe Magic LanternâState Ball on DeckâMock TrialsâCharadesâPilgrim SolemnityâSlow MusicâThe Executive Officer Delivers an Opinion
- 5. Summer in Mid-AtlanticâAn Eccentric MoonâMr. Blucher Loses ConfidenceâThe Mystery of âShip TimeââThe Denizens of the DeepââLand HohââThe First Landing on a Foreign ShoreâSensation among the NativesâSomething about the Azores IslandsâBlucherâs Disastrous DinnerâThe Happy Result
- 6. Solid InformationâA Fossil CommunityâCurious Ways and CustomsâJesuit HumbuggeryâFantastic PilgrimizingâOrigin of the Russ PavementâSquaring Accounts with the FossilsâAt Sea Again
- 7. A Tempest at NightâSpain and Africa on ExhibitionâGreeting a Majestic StrangerâThe Pillars of HerculesâThe Rock of GibraltarâTiresome RepetitionââThe Queenâs ChairââSerenity ConqueredâCuriosities of the Secret CavernsâPersonnel of GibraltarâSome Odd CharactersâA Private Frolic in AfricaâBearding a Moorish Garrison (without loss of life)âVanity RebukedâDisembarking in the Empire of Morocco
- 8. The Ancient City of Tangier, MoroccoâStrange SightsâA Cradle of AntiquityâWe become WealthyâHow they Rob the Mail in AfricaâThe Danger of being Opulent in Morocco
- 9. A Pilgrimâin Deadly PerilâHow they Mended the ClockâMoorish Punishments for CrimeâMarriage CustomsâLooking Several ways for SundayâShrewd, Practice of Mohammedan PilgrimsâReverence for CatsâBliss of being a Consul-General
- 10. Fourth of July at SeaâMediterranean SunsetâThe âOracleâ is Delivered of an OpinionâCelebration CeremoniesâThe Captainâs SpeechâFrance in SightâThe Ignorant NativeâIn MarseillesâAnother BlunderâLost in the Great CityâFound AgainâA Frenchy Scene
- 11. Getting used to itâNo SoapâBill of Fare, Table dâhoteââAn American SirââA Curious DiscoveryâThe âPilgrimâ BirdâStrange CompanionshipâA Grave of the LivingâA Long CaptivityâSome of Dumasâ HeroesâDungeon of the Famous âIron Mask.â
- 12. A Holiday Flight through FranceâSummer Garb of the LandscapeâAbroad on the Great PlainsâPeculiarities of French CarsâFrench Politeness American Railway OfficialsââTwenty Minutes to Dinner!ââWhy there are no AccidentsâThe âOld TravellersââStill on the WingâParis at LastââFrench Order and QuietâPlace of the BastileâSeeing the SightsâA Barbarous AtrocityâAbsurd Billiards
- 13. More TroubleâMonsieur BillfingerâRe-Christening the FrenchmanâIn the Clutches of a Paris GuideâThe International ExpositionâFine Military ReviewâGlimpse of the Emperor Napoleon and the Sultan of Turkey
- 14. The Venerable Cathedral of Notre-DameâJean Sanspeurâs AdditionâTreasures and Sacred RelicsâThe Legend of the CrossâThe MorgueâThe Outrageious âCan-CanââBlondin AflameâThe Louvre PalaceâThe Great ParkâShowy PageantryâPreservation of Noted Things
- 15. French National BuryingâGroundâAmong the Great DeadâThe Shrine of Disappointed LoveâThe Story of Abelard and HeloiseââEnglish Spoken HereâââAmerican Drinks Compounded HereââImperial Honors to an AmericanâThe Over-estimated GrisetteâDeparture from ParisâA Deliberate Opinion Concerning the Comeliness of American Women
- 16. VersaillesâParadise RegainedâA Wonderful ParkâParadise LostâNapoleonic Strategy
- 17. WarâThe American Forces Victoriousââ Home AgainââItaly in Sight The âCity of PalacesââBeauty of the Genoese WomenâThe âStub-HuntersââAmong the PalacesâGifted GuideâChurch MagnificenceââWomen not AdmittedââHow the Genoese LiveâMassive ArchitectureâA Scrap of Ancient HistoryâGraves for 60,000
- 18. Flying Through ItalyâMarengoâFirst Glimpse of the Famous CathedralâDescription of some of its WondersâA Horror Carved in StoneââAn Unpleasant AdventureâA Good ManâA Sermon from the TombâTons of Gold and SilverâSome More Holy RelicsâSolomonâs Temple
- 19. âDo You Wiz zo Haut can be?ââLa ScalaâPetrarch and LauraâLucrezia BorgiaâIngenious FrescoesâAncient Roman AmphitheatreâA Clever DelusionâDistressing BilliardsâThe Chief Charm of European LifeâAn Italian BathâWanted: SoapâCrippled FrenchâMutilated EnglishâThe Most Celebrated Painting in the WorldâAmateur RapturesâUninspired CriticsâAnecdoteâA Wonderful EchoâA Kiss for a Franc
- 20. Rural Italy by RailâFumigated, According to LawâThe Sorrowing EnglishmanâNight by the Lake of ComoâThe Famous LakeâIts SceneryâComo compared with TahoeâMeeting a Shipmate
- 21. The Pretty Lago di LeccoâA Carriage Drive in the CountryâAstonishing Sociability in a CoachmanâSleepy LandâBloody ShrinesâThe Heart and Home of PriestcraftâA Thrilling Mediaeval RomanceâThe Birthplace of HarlequinâApproaching Venice
- 22. Night in VeniceâThe âGay GondolierââThe Grand Fete by MoonlightâThe Notable Sights of VeniceâThe Mother of the Republics Desolate
- 23. The Famous GondolaâThe Gondola in an Unromantic AspectâThe Great Square of St. Mark and the Winged LionâSnobs, at Home and AbroadâSepulchres of the Great DeadâA Tilt at the âOld MastersââA Contraband GuideâThe ConspiracyâMoving Again
- 24. Down Through Italy by RailâIdling in FlorenceâDante and GalileoâAn Ungrateful CityâDazzling GenerosityâWonderful MosaicsâThe Historical ArnoâLost AgainâFound Again, but no Fatted Calf ReadyâThe Leaning Tower of PisaâThe Ancient DuomoâThe Old Original First Pendulum that Ever SwungâAn Enchanting EchoâA New Holy SepulchreâA Relic of AntiquityâA Fallen RepublicâAt LeghornâAt Home Again, and Satisfied, on Board the ShipâOur Vessel an Object of Grave SuspicionâGaribaldi VisitedâThreats of Quarantine
- 25. The Works of BankruptcyâRailway GrandeurâHow to Fill an Empty TreasuryâThe Sumptuousness of Mother ChurchâEcclesiastical SplendorâMagnificence and MiseryâGeneral ExecrationâMore Magnificence A Good Word for the PriestsâCivita Vecchia the DismalâOff for Rome
- 26. The Modern Roman on His TravelsâThe Grandeur of St. PeterâsâHoly RelicsâGrand View from the DomeâThe Holy InquisitionâInteresting Old Monkish FraudsâThe Ruined ColiseumâThe Coliseum in the Days of its PrimeâAncient Playbill of a Coliseum PerformanceâA Roman Newspaper Criticism 1700 Years Old
- 27. âButchered to Make a Roman HolidayââThe Man who Never ComplainedâAn Exasperating SubjectâAsinine GuidesâThe Roman Catacombs The Saint Whose Fervor Burst his RibsâThe Miracle of the Bleeding HeartâThe Legend of Ara Coeli
- 28. Picturesque HorrorsâThe Legend of Brother ThomasâSorrow Scientifically AnalyzedâA Festive Company of the DeadâThe Great Vatican Museum Artist Sins of OmissionâThe Rape of the SabinesâPapal Protection of ArtâHigh Price of âOld MastersââImproved ScriptureâScale of Rank of the Holy Personages in RomeâScale of Honors Accorded ThemâFossilizingâAway for Naples
- 29. NaplesâIn Quarantine at LastâAnnunciationâAscent of Mount VesuviusâA Two Cent CommunityâThe Black Side of Neapolitan CharacterâMonkish MiraclesâAscent of Mount Vesuvius ContinuedâThe Stranger and the HackmanâNight View of Naples from the Mountain-side-âAscent of Mount Vesuvius Continued
- 30. Ascent of Mount Vesuvius ContinuedâBeautiful View at DawnâLess Beautiful in the Back StreetsâAscent of Vesuvius ContinuedâDwellings a Hundred Feet HighâA Motley ProcessionâBill of Fare for a Peddlerâs BreakfastâPrincely SalariesâAscent of Vesuvius ContinuedâAn Average of PricesâThe wonderful âBlue GrottoââVisit to Celebrated Localities in the Bay of NaplesâThe Poisoned âGrotto of the DogââA Petrified Sea of LavaâAscent of Mount Vesuvius ContinuedâThe Summit ReachedâDescription of the CraterâDescent of Vesuvius
- 31. The Buried City of PompeiiâHow Dwellings Appear that have been Unoccupied for Eighteen hundred yearsâThe Judgment SeatâDesolationâThe Footprints of the DepartedââNo Women AdmittedââTheatres, Bakeshops, SchoolsâSkeletons preserved by the Ashes and CindersâThe Brave Martyr to DutyâRip Van WinkleâThe Perishable Nature of Fame
- 32. At Sea Once MoreâThe Pilgrims all WellâSuperb StromboliâSicily by MoonlightâScylla and CharybdisâThe âOracleâ at FaultâSkirting the Isles of Greece Ancient AthensâBlockaded by Quarantine and Refused Permission to EnterâRunning the BlockadeâA Bloodless Midnight AdventureâTurning Robbers from NecessityâAttempt to Carry the Acropolis by StormâWe FailâAmong the Glories of the PastâA World of Ruined SculptureâA Fairy VisionâFamous LocalitiesâRetreating in Good OrderâCaptured by the GuardsâTravelling in Military StateâSafe on Board Again
- 33. Modern GreeceâFallen GreatnessâSailing Through the Archipelago and the DardanellesâFootprints of HistoryâThe First Shoddy Contractor of whom History gives any AccountâAnchored Before ConstantinopleâFantastic FashionsâThe Ingenious Goose-RancherâMarvelous CripplesâThe Great MosqueâThe Thousand and One ColumnsâThe Grand Bazaar of Stamboul
- 34. Scarcity of Morals and WhiskeyâSlave-Girl Market ReportâCommercial Morality at a DiscountâThe Slandered Dogs of ConstantinopleâQuestionable Delights of Newspaperdom in TurkeyâIngenious Italian JournalismâNo More Turkish Lunches DesiredâThe Turkish Bath FraudâThe Narghileh FraudâJackplaned by a NativeâThe Turkish Coffee Fraud
- 35. Sailing Through the Bosporus and the Black SeaââFar-Away MosesââMelancholy SebastopolâHospitably Received in RussiaâPleasant English PeopleâDesperate FightingâRelic HuntingâHow Travellers Form âCabinetsâ
- 36. Nine Thousand Miles EastâImitation American Town in RussiaâGratitude that Came Too LateâTo Visit the Autocrat of All the Russias
- 37. Summer Home of RoyaltyâPractising for the Dread OrdealâCommittee on Imperial AddressâReception by the Emperor and FamilyâDresses of the Imperial PartyâConcentrated PowerâCounting the SpoonsâAt the Grand DukeâsâA Charming VillaâA Knightly FigureâThe Grand DuchessâA Grand Ducal BreakfastâBakerâs Boy, the Famine-BreederâTheatrical Monarchs a FraudâSaved as by FireâThe GovernorâGeneralâs Visit to the ShipâOfficial âStyleââAristocratic VisitorsââMunchausenizingâ with ThemâClosing Ceremonies
- 38. Return to ConstantinopleâWe Sail for AsiaâThe Sailors Burlesque the Imperial VisitorsâAncient SmyrnaâThe âOriental Splendorâ FraudâThe âBiblical Crown of LifeââPilgrim Prophecy-SavansâSociable Armenian GirlsâA Sweet ReminiscenceââThe Camels are Coming, Ha-ha!â
- 39. Smyrnaâs LionsâThe Martyr PolycarpâThe âSeven ChurchesââRemains of the Six SmyrnasâMysterious Oyster Mine OystersâSeeking SceneryâA Millerite TraditionâA Railroad Out of its Sphere
- 40. Journeying Toward Ancient EphesusâAncient AyassalookâThe Villanous DonkeyâA Fantastic ProcessionâBygone MagnificenceâFragments of HistoryâThe Legend of the Seven Sleepers
- 41. Vandalism ProhibitedâAngry PilgrimsâApproaching Holy Land!âThe âShrill Note of PreparationââDistress About Dragomans and TransportationâThe âLong Routeâ AdoptedâIn SyriaâSomething about BeiroutâA Choice Specimen of a Greek âFergusonââOutfitsâHideous HorsefleshâPilgrim âStyleââWhat of Aladdinâs Lamp?
- 42. âJacksonville,â in the Mountains of LebanonâBreakfasting above a Grand PanoramaâThe Vanished CityâThe Peculiar Steed, âJerichoââThe Pilgrims ProgressâBible ScenesâMount Hermon, Joshuaâs Battle Fields, etc.âThe Tomb of NoahâA Most Unfortunate People
- 43. Patriarchal CustomsâMagnificent BaalbecâDescription of the RuinsâScribbling Smiths and JonesesâPilgrim Fidelity to the Letter of the LawâThe Revered Fountain of Baalamâs Ass
- 44. Extracts from Note-BookâMahometâs Paradise and the BibleâsâBeautiful Damascus the Oldest City on EarthâOriental Scenes within the Curious Old CityâDamascus Street CarâThe Story of St. PaulâThe âStreet called StraightââMahometâs Tomb and St. GeorgeâsâThe Christian MassacreâMohammedan Dread of PollutionâThe House of NaamanâThe Horrors of Leprosy
- 45. The Cholera by way of VarietyâHotâAnother Outlandish ProcessionâPen and-Ink Photograph of âJonesborough,â SyriaâTomb of Nimrod, the Mighty HunterâThe Stateliest Ruin of AllâStepping over the Borders of Holy-LandâBathing in the Sources of JordanâMore âSpecimenâ HuntingâRuins of CesareaâPhilippiââOn This Rock Will I Build my ChurchââThe People the Disciples KnewâThe Noble Steed âBaalbecââSentimental Horse Idolatry of the Arabs
- 46. DanâBashanâGenessaretâA Notable PanoramaâSmallness of PalestineâScraps of HistoryâCharacter of the CountryâBedouin ShepherdsâGlimpses of the Hoary PastâMr. Grimesâs BedouinsâA BattleâGround of JoshuaâThat Soldierâs Manner of FightingâBarakâs BattleâThe Necessity of Unlearning Some ThingsâDesolation
- 47. âJackâs AdventureââJosephâs PitâThe Story of JosephâJosephâs Magnanimity and EsauâsâThe Sacred Lake of GenessaretâEnthusiasm of the PilgrimsâWhy We did not Sail on GalileeâAbout CapernaumâConcerning the Saviourâs Brothers and SistersâJourneying toward Magdela
- 48. Curious Specimens of Art and ArchitectureâPublic Reception of the PilgrimsâMary Magdalenâs HouseâTiberias and its Queer InhabitantsâThe Sacred Sea of GalileeâGalilee by Night
- 49. The Ancient BathsâYe ApparitionâA Distinguished PanoramaâThe Last Battle of the CrusadesâThe Story of the Lord of KerakâMount TaborâWhat one Sees from its TopâMemory of a Wonderful GardenâThe House of Deborah the Prophetess
- 50. Toward NazarethâBitten By a CamelâGrotto of the Annunciation, NazarethâNoted Grottoes in GeneralâJosephâs WorkshopâA Sacred BowlderâThe Fountain of the VirginâQuestionable Female BeautyâLiterary Curiosities
- 51. Boyhood of the SaviourâUnseemly Antics of Sober PilgrimsâHome of the Witch of EndorâNainâProfanationâA Popular Oriental PictureâBiblical Metaphors Becoming steadily More IntelligibleâThe Shuuem MiracleâThe âFree Son of The DesertââAncient JezraelâJehuâs AchievementsâSamaria and its Famous Siege
- 52. Curious Remnant of the PastâShechemâThe Oldest âFirst Familyâ on EarthâThe Oldest Manuscript ExtantâThe Genuine Tomb of JosephâJacobâs WellâShilohâCamping with the ArabsâJacobâs LadderâMore DesolationâRamah, Beroth, the Tomb of Samuel, The Fountain of BeiraâImpatienceâApproaching JerusalemâThe Holy City in SightâNoting Its Prominent FeaturesâDomiciled Within the Sacred Walls
- 53. âThe Joy of the Whole EarthââDescription of JerusalemâChurch of the Holy SepulchreâThe Stone of UnctionâThe Grave of JesusâGraves of Nicodemus and Joseph of ArmatteaâPlaces of the ApparitionâThe Finding of the There CrossesââThe LegendâMonkish ImposturesâThe Pillar of FlagellationâThe Place of a RelicâGodfreyâs SwordââThe Bonds of ChristâââThe Center of the EarthââPlace whence the Dust was taken of which Adam was MadeâGrave of AdamâThe Martyred SoldierâThe Copper Plate that was on the CrossâThe Good St. HelenaâPlace of the Division of the GarmentsâSt. Dimas, the Penitent ThiefâThe Late Emperor Maximilianâs ContributionâGrotto wherein the Crosses were Found, and the Nails, and the Crown of ThornsâChapel of the MockingâTomb of MelchizedekâGraves of Two Renowned CrusadersâThe Place of the Crucifixion
- 54. The âSorrowful WayââThe Legend of St. Veronicaâs HandkerchiefâAn Illustrious StoneâHouse of the Wandering JewâThe Tradition of the WandererâSolomonâs TempleâMosque of OmarâMoslem TraditionsââWomen not AdmittedââThe Fate of a GossipâTurkish Sacred RelicsâJudgment Seat of David and SaulâGenuine Precious Remains of Solomonâs TempleâSurfeited with SightsâThe Pool of SiloamâThe Garden of Gethsemane and Other Sacred Localities
- 55. Rebellion in the CampâCharms of Nomadic LifeâDismal RumorsâEn Route for Jericho and The Dead SeaâPilgrim StrategyâBethany and the Dwelling of LazarusââBedouins!ââAncient JerichoâMiseryâThe Night MarchâThe Dead SeaâAn Idea of What a âWildernessâ in Palestine isâThe Holy hermits of Mars SabaâGood St. SabaâWomen not AdmittedâBuried from the World for all TimeâUnselfish Catholic BenevolenceâGazellesâThe Plain of the ShepherdsâBirthplace of the Saviour, BethlehemâChurch of the NativityâIts Hundred Holy PlacesâThe Famous âMilkâ GrottoâTraditionâReturn to JerusalemâExhausted
- 56. Departure from JerusalemâSamsonâThe Plain of SharonâArrival at JoppaâHorse of Simon the TannerâThe Long Pilgrimage EndedâCharacter of Palestine SceneryâThe Curse
- 57. The Happiness of being at Sea once moreââHomeâ as it is in a Pleasure ShipââShaking Handsâ with the VesselâJack in CostumeâHis Fatherâs Parting AdviceâApproaching EgyptâAshore in AlexandriaâA Deserved Compliment for the DonkeysâInvasion of the Lost Tribes of AmericaâEnd of the Celebrated âJaffa ColonyââScenes in Grand CairoâShepheardâs Hotel Contrasted with a Certain American HotelâPreparing for the Pyramids
- 58. âRechercheâ DonkeysâA Wild RideâSpecimens of Egyptian ModestyâMoses in the BulrushesâPlace where the Holy Family SojournedâDistant view of the PyramidsâA Nearer ViewâThe AscentâSuperb View from the top of the PyramidââBacksheesh! Backsheesh!ââAn Arab ExploitâIn the Bowels of the PyramidâStrategyâReminiscence of âHolidayâs HillââBoyish ExploitâThe Majestic SphynxâThings the Author will not TellâGrand Old Egypt
- 59. Going HomeâA Demoralized Note-BookâA Boyâs DiaryâMere Mention of Old SpainâDeparture from CadizâA Deserved RebukeâThe Beautiful MadeirasâTabooedâIn the Delightful BermudasâAn English WelcomeâGood-by to âOur Friends the BermudiansââPacking Trunks for HomeâOur First AccidentâThe Long Cruise Drawing to a CloseâAt HomeâAmen
- 60. Thankless DevotionâA Newspaper ValedictoryâConclusion
- A Note About the Author
- A Note from the Publisher