2:22: A Ghost Story (NHB Modern Plays)

Danny Robins

• Publisher: Nick Hern Books
• Year: 2021
• ISBN:
  9781788504782
• Topic: Literature
• Subtopic: British Drama
• Index: Literature

'I'd get freaked out here, alone in the dark. Wondering what's lurking at the bottom of the bed, ready to grab your feet.'

Jenny and Sam – and their baby Phoebe – have recently moved into their new home. But something feels frightening and wrong. Very wrong. Over the baby monitor, at 2: 22 every night, Jenny hears footsteps around her daughter's cot. Could the house be haunted?

When their friends Lauren and Ben come round for a housewarming dinner, they drink wine, relive their pasts, and argue about the existence of ghosts. They decide to stay up until 2: 22, to discover the truth. Over one adrenaline-filled night – as the foxes scream outside – secrets will emerge and ghosts may appear…

Spine-chilling, funny and scary, Danny Robins' play 2: 22 was premiered at the Noël Coward Theatre in London's West End in August 2021, directed by Matthew Dunster, and starring Lily Allen, Julia Chan, Hadley Fraser and Jake Wood. It provides rich opportunities for any drama group wanting to make things go bump in the night – and their audiences scream.

ACT ONE

Scene One

A Victorian terraced house in the midst of renovation. There’s a spacious open-plan kitchen and dining room, the result of a new extension. It’s fresh, shiny; IKEA supplemented with more expensive items.

A simple old wooden dining table is surrounded by four chairs. Further away are a sofa, coffee table, beanbag and white rug, strewn with baby toys. There are framed pictures of a baby on a shelf.

There’s a door to a guest toilet – sink and cupboards visible – and another door to the hall, through which we see recently polished floorboards and stairs.

The upstage wall bridges the extension and the original house. The new side is taken up by imposing glass doors looking onto a dark garden. Near the doors is a telescope on a stand. The rest of the wall is midway through being painted white. There are stubborn remnants of twee 1970s wallpaper.

JENNY is standing on a stepladder, painting, wearing pyjamas, a fleece jacket and scarf. On the floor is an assortment of paint tins, rollers, etc.

On the kitchen counter is a baby monitor, green lights flickering, registering the ambient noise of a sleeping baby.

There’s a large digital clock on the wall. The red numbers change to 02:20…

JENNY stops and comes down the ladder. She pours some white spirit into a jar and puts her brush into it. There’s a glass of red wine on the floor. She finishes it and turns off the light, then takes her glass to the kitchen, putting it in the dishwasher –

Outside, a security light lurches on, illuminating the garden and an old shed, making her jump. She looks through the glass – nothing.

The security light goes out. It’s dark again; only the spill from the hall. She walks towards the door – suddenly, the tinny, computerised sound of ‘Old MacDonald’ punctures the silence –

JENNY. Fuck!

She’s stepped on a child’s toy. She picks it up, flicks a switch – the music stops. The clock changes to 02:21. She takes a breath, her heart thumping, and walks out of the room –

We hear her walk upstairs. Then, through the monitor, a bedroom door creaks open, followed by the whimper of a baby, mid-dream, and JENNY’s soothing voice –

(Offstage.) Sssh! It’s okay, baba… It’s okay.

We hear JENNY leave the room, then the monitor emits the beeps that show it’s run out of battery and goes dead.

A long beat… The clock changes to 02:22. Another beat, then the silence is torn apart by JENNY screaming, loud and awful.

Blackout.

The red numbers of the digital clock sear themselves into the dark.

Scene Two

In the darkness, the clock races forwards to 20:36. Lights up.

The toilet door is now closed. LAUREN is standing in the kitchen, holding a glass of wine and inexpertly poking a pan of risotto with a wooden spoon. She’s dressed up for dinner but cool and casual.

The baby monitor is on the counter next to her. Through it, we hear SAM reading We’re Going on a Bear Hunt by Michael Rosen.

LAUREN listens, hooked by the rhythmic flow of SAM’s voice, as JENNY enters, in a dress and heels.

SAM gets to the point in the story where the family have tiptoed into the cave and spotted something in the dark… JENNY turns the monitor off.

LAUREN. I was enjoying that.

JENNY. Sorry.

(Then.) Spoiler alert – it’s a bear.

An awkward beat. JENNY picks up the stepladder.

Phoebe doesn’t understand a word of it. But you know what Sam’s like. She’ll have a PhD by the time she’s three.

She’s managed to pick up the paint tins too and tries to open the patio door –

Sorry – it’s a tip.

LAUREN helps open the door.

LAUREN. It’s so not.

JENNY lugs the ladder and paint to the shed.

JENNY (from garden). There’s still loads to do!

LAUREN. We could have rescheduled.

JENNY comes back in – banging her arm on the patio door as she passes.

JENNY. Ow! I told Sam to tidy.

LAUREN. When did he get back?

JENNY. An hour ago. No fucking warning he’d be late.

She shuts the door. An awkward beat – neither quite knowing what to say next.

He’ll be down soon.

LAUREN (trying hard). You look good.

JENNY starts to pick up baby toys from the rug, putting them into a toybox.

JENNY. I look tired.

(Noticing a spot on her dress.) And stained.

(Scratches at it.) Paint.

LAUREN. Fuck.

She pours JENNY a glass of wine.

JENNY (crossing to check). How’s the risotto?

LAUREN. I gave it a few prods.

She hands JENNY the glass.

JENNY. Thanks.

She sips.

LAUREN. Ben chose it. / Sorry.

JENNY. It’s fine.

She spots another toy and picks it up – a teddy bear.

‘Mister Bear’. / She loves it.

LAUREN. I never know what to send. It was him or tequila.

JENNY puts the bear on a shelf.

JENNY. God, not while I’m feeding.

(Relaxing slightly.) Can you imagine? Breast-milk slammers.

LAUREN. Can’t believe I haven’t met her yet.

JENNY. Sorry.

LAUREN. It’s me. I’ve been so busy. / Lots of new patients…

JENNY. No. It’s our fault. The first year, you know how it is…

LAUREN. Not really.

The toilet flushes.

JENNY. We don’t see anyone. Just other people with babies.

LAUREN. Breeders.

JENNY stirs the risotto.

You must be desperate to get back to work?...

Table of contents

• Cover
• Title page
• Contents
• Introduction by Danny Robins
• Original Production Details
• Dedication
• 2:22 – A Ghost Story
• Author’s Note
• Acknowledgements
• About the Author
• Copyright and Performing Rights Information