Appreciative Coaching

A Positive Process for Change

Sara L. Orem, Jacqueline Binkert, Ann L. Clancy

• Editore: Jossey-Bass
• Anno: 2011
• ISBN:
  9781118047132
• Edizione: 1
• Argomento: Negocios y empresa
• Categoria: Gestión de recursos humanos

Appreciative Coaching describes an approach to coaching that is rooted in Appreciative Inquiry. At its core the Appreciative Coaching method shows individuals how to tap into (or rediscover) their own sense of wonder and excitement about their present life and future possibilities. Rather than focusing on individuals in limited or problem-oriented ways, Appreciate Coaching guides clients through four stages—Discovery, Dream, Design, and Destiny—that inspire them to an appreciative and empowering view of themselves and their future.

1

An Overview of Appreciative Coaching

Look with favour upon a bold beginning.

Virgil (70-19 B.C.), Roman epic poet

The best place to start, most often, is at the beginning. Although there were many beginnings to developing our Appreciative Coaching process together and many beginnings to the work we will describe here, Alan’s story seemed just right to introduce you to what this book is all about.

Alan’s Story

It started for me when I realized that despite all of my best efforts, I was not making any progress in obtaining enough billable client work to sustain my business. My frustrations and concerns grew to the point that I was beyond worrying about the potential embarrassment of admitting my struggles to friends and colleagues. And then one day it came to me . . . I needed to get some coaching—an objective, outside look into what I was doing, how I was doing it, and how I was being a barrier to my own success. The face of a good friend and colleague popped into my thoughts. I can’t explain exactly why she came to mind, other than that the many conversations we’ve had over the last seven years have led me to respect her thinking, her compassion, and her integrity very much.

Alan’s coach also remembers the beginning:

One day in the fall, Alan called to ask if I would meet with him to discuss something of a personal nature. We decided to meet at a local coffee shop, where he told me that he was feeling demoralized because he was unable to make an adequate living doing the work he loved. His situation had become so critical that he would soon be faced with making decisions he did not want to make. He said he worked very hard and gave away a great deal to local community groups and businesses in an effort to make his work known, but the financial benefit was not coming back to him as he had hoped. The situation was serious, if not quite desperate. He was looking to me to see if I could give him some information that might yield insight and ideas for action on his part to change his situation. He did not want to move away from the work he loved and did so well. His clients valued him, his work, and the results they were able to produce because of his interactions with them.

Alan is an organization development consultant in the Detroit area—an area that has been severely depressed economically since the 9/11 attacks. It is an automotive city where the Big Three—General Motors, Ford Motor Company, and DaimlerChrysler—have their corporate headquarters. The economy is dependent on these giants, as many businesses support them through the supply of parts, direct support, and indirect services. When the Big Three do not do well, everyone in Detroit suffers, especially the small service providers like Alan.

Alan and I agreed to an Appreciative Coaching relationship and to meet weekly for an hour. We agreed that the topic for coaching was “making money doing the work he loves.”

Discovery

Alan remembers getting started with his coach:

Within a few hours of our agreeing to a process and a start date, she e-mailed me a couple of forms. One was her Client Information Form and the other was a Coaching Prep Form, both of which she asked me to complete before our first session. These forms were an indicator to me that the approach she was using, and the opportunities I would see as a result, were both different from any other I had experienced and very special. These were some of the questions:

• Describe your three greatest accomplishments to date.

• What made these accomplishments stand out for you?

• What have you incorporated into your current actions from your past accomplishments?

• How could you use what you’ve learned from these accomplishments to assist you in making future changes?

• Who are, or have been, your major role models?

• What attributes of these role models do you admire and most appreciate?

• What are the five most positive things in your life?

• Who are the key supportive people in your life, and what do they provide for you?

• List five adjectives that describe you at your best.

• What energizes you?

• What would you like to contribute to the world?

• What are you most wanting to achieve in the next three years?

These are not the usual sort of questions I see. There was no asking about problems or concerns or issues or anything that was negative. Instead the questions were framed in a positive manner, and as I thought about them, I felt a growing sense of energy and optimism inside myself. I felt good about myself as I answered these questions . . . and even better about the possibility of good things happening for me as a result of the upcoming coaching. This positive energy carried over into our first actual coaching session. I looked forward to the beginning session with great hope and optimism. I was predisposed to believe that I would find great insights about myself as a result of the questions my coach had already asked and those she would be asking throughout the coaching process. The more I thought about things, the better I felt, and the higher my hopes and expectations soared. The last comment I wrote on my prep form before the initial session was “. . . sort of like I’ve gotten an injection of positive vibes or something like that.”

The first coaching session with Alan was in person. His coach describes it here:

We went through the four appreciative questions we ask in the first session. Throughout our first meeting, Alan maintained a positive demeanor. Occasionally, the sadness and concern about his business came through, but in general, the questions elicited responses that showed he held great joy in his work. His answers were descriptive and provided rich detail. I believed in his passion for his work and that he made meaningful connections with his clients, serving them well. Even through the positive responses, however, I observed that Alan gave a lot to friends, colleagues, and clients and made very few requests of them. So I asked Alan to consider the flow of giving in each of the stories he told; that is, I asked him to think about the direction of giving and receiving. I was very careful to ask this question in a neutral way. His own startled observation was that the flow was mostly unidirectional, from him to others. I thought about asking him to identify situations where he had made requests that had worked out well, but decided to wait because we needed to take the process at Alan’s tempo. He needed time to consider what was clearly a new learning for him. He left our meeting energized by the work we had done and eager to move forward with the coaching process. After this session, I reflected on how important it was to be in a learning mode with our clients, to allow the client to reveal the possibilities for us.

As Alan reports here, the meeting exceeded his already high expectations:

My coach walked me through the Client Information Form by asking probing, positive questions. Partway through this first session, she mentioned that she was seeing something of a trend in my way of being with clients and potential clients, and she asked me a couple of great questions that helped me see the same thing. The insights for me from this first conversation included the following:

• I tend to do a lot of giving to others but not much asking for myself. And, without asking, there isn’t much for the universe to work with.

• I was habitually taking on more than 100 percent responsibility for professional relationships.¹

• I was much more successful in past situations when I only took on 100 percent and made direct requests of others to do the same.

• I should probably be clearer about what I need regarding my requests of others (and the universe).

This was a very powerful and liberating set of learnings for me, and they immediately began having a positive impact on my conscious thinking and behavior. These insights both pushed and pulled me onto a more energized and successful path.

Over the next few sessions, Alan and his coach continued to focus on the issue of taking responsibility and making requests. As they did so, Alan gained even more insights into his own potential. He describes his experience:

The insights gained from our third and fourth sessions were just as amazing and just as valuable for me: whenever I am bold and centered and make requests that benefit both parties, I am more successful. What can I learn from my reflections regarding requests, trends, balance points, feelings, and so on? How can I use this learning to become centered and even more powerful in my behaviors?

My coach continued to ask me very positive, very probing, very challenging questions around all these issues, all the while helping me feel more positive about taking new actions that could achieve more successful outcomes for each issue. Every question, and every agreed-on action, was geared toward trying something that fit with my strengths, values, and vision and that would lead to positive outcomes.

Alan shared his insights with his coach. She reports:

By our third session, Alan had a clear and strong understanding of what balance of responsibility felt like and why it was important to him. He shared that realizing how making requests was beneficial both to him and the other party was a turning point for him. He felt great; making clear requests was something that he knew he could do because he had already demonstrated he could. It was not unfamiliar territory.

Dream

As his coach continued to work with Alan, they shifted their focus from immediate awareness of how Alan was changing in his business to how he wanted to change his business. The coach started moving Alan toward a new dream or vision for his business:

Once the discoveries were well under way, Alan and I shifted to his dream for his business. He started documenting his business life: mission, vision, value, colleagues, clients, revenue, reputation. The list was quite complete and the descriptions very rich.

Alan realized there was a major disconnect between his vision and his behavior in his business partnership. He describes his situation this way:

One example of how this appreciative approach played out for me is the relationship with my business partner. One of the insights I gained from working with my coach is that my vision won’t be achieved if I continue to behave in the way I’ve been behaving with respect to the partnership issue and process. I am not addressing the situation for some reason(s) . She began by asking me what I needed and wanted in a business partner. She asked me to create a list. She also coached me through developing a request for my business partner to create his own list around the same question. My business partner and I then shared our respective lists with each other. Our lists were very different, and this prompted us to have a long conversation about those differences, or mismatches. It was one of the best conversations I’ve had with my business partner in several years . . . very healthy, very personal, very revealing . . . and a relief for both of us to realize that we had been feeling many of the same less-than-happy things related to the professional relationship.

My coach then asked me to review my vision for the business, taking into account the new realizations about the mismatches with my business partner. The resulting vision was much more personal and much more vibrant and full of possibilities than it had been only a few weeks before. She applied the same basic process as she had with the partner needs list . . . she asked me to develop a request for my business partner to create his vision for the business. Again, we shared our respective visions with each other, and discovered even more mismatches. Clearly we were both learning a great deal of extremely critical information about ourselves, our hopes and dreams, and our potential for continuing in a collective business.

In the end, my business partner and I collectively, through reasonable conversation, came to the conclusion that we did not want the same things from and for the business, and that we should not continue on as partners in the business. We parted as professional partners, but remained good friends. I really believe that the partnership would have ended eventually, but without the good feelings and intact friendship. I know that my business partner and I would have ended up in some sort of major conflict had my coach not helped me take only 100 percent responsibility and make reasonable requests of my business partner to do the same. Her questions helped me frame the situation in a very different and very positive light . . . something I had not been able to do for over three years previously.

Alan’s coach was proud of the way he moved forward with a new dream for himself:

In painting his future picture, Alan came to realize that the relationship with his business partner was not of the type he dreamed about, but he felt unsure about how to bring this up with him. Following the principles and practices of Appreciative Coaching, Alan decided that it would be ideal for him to engage his partner in his own dream for the business. He felt very capable and eager to lead this discussion. Perhaps not surprisingly, both partners discovered that they were not suited to one another. Happily this process of conversation allowed them to disengage amicably and productively.

Design

Over several months, Alan and his coach crafted a strategy using his strengths and expertise to build his business, being mindful of the balance between his giving to and receiving from his clients. His coach reports:

The coaching meetings were held over the telephone. Each time, Alan provided me with a summary of our coaching conversation, his learnings, and a list of assignments for the coming week. Prior to each session, Alan sent me his Coaching Prep Form and any assignments that were in written form. Alan took coaching very seriously and did everything he could to make the most of it. Together we created an economic exchange process as an application of his new learnings to marketing and sales. It was a process that felt comfortable to him and one that he was eager to try out. In parallel with creating this process, Alan and I also spoke about practical marketing efforts that he could make in the present. We enhanced the implementation of what he already did well with new understanding and experimenting.

During this time, Alan told me several stories of pivotal moments when he came to recognize that the w...