Stop Complainers and Energy Drainers
How to Negotiate Work Drama to Get More Done
- English
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Stop Complainers and Energy Drainers
How to Negotiate Work Drama to Get More Done
About This Book
Turn constant complainers into productive contributors
Constant complainers take up resources, time, and mental bandwidth in the workplace. When you change a culture of complainers to one of contributors, you boost morale, increase productivity, and promote effective communication. In short, you get more done with less drama. In Stop Complainers and Energy Drainers, workplace communication expert Linda Swindling shares her expertise in negotiating tough situations in the workplace. Discover how to influence others to accomplish your purpose. Stop Complainers and Energy Drainers uses scenarios, engaging questions, and survey results to provide strategies that can be implemented immediately.
- Shows how to identify complainers and time drainers
- Provides forms to help prepare for discussions, suggested language to show up powerfully, and encouragement to apply strategies
- Offers concrete phrases and tactics to refocus a complainer and end unproductive conversations
Stop Complainers and Energy Drainers is research-driven and focused on how to identify as well as manage conversations with "venters, " complainers, whiners, and energy drainers. With these guidelines for communication, you'll see powerful results, improved relationships, and increased confidence.
Frequently asked questions
Chapter 1
Whiners
Spot a Whiner
Are You Negotiating with a Whiner?
- complain about how things arenât fair.
- play the victim and are powerless.
- always seem to have something wrong in their lives.
- are always upset about something or someone.
- never bring solutions, only problems.
Reactions.
Reality.
Stop a Whiner
- Giving reasons their reaction is irrational or unproductive. Whiners are not concerned with rational outcomes or the inconsistency of their actions. They want empathy, not logic.
- Forcing them into problem solving before they vent. Whiners have to release their emotions and feel heard before they are open to solutions or a proactive approach. Trying to make Whiners feel better by complimenting them wonât help, nor will telling them to âgrow up.â
- Venting along with them or solving their problem. Whining with them just encourages more complaining. When you provide an opinion or offer solutions, they usually reject your advice or make excuses. On the rare occasion they accept and act on your suggestion, they will blame you if the result is bad. And, if the advice works, you now become their crutch for making their future decisions.
- Listen. Whiners are trying to connect and build relationships through their complaining. Seems counterintuitive, doesnât it? Spending a few minutes actively listening and even mirroring back what you hear from Whiners goes a long way with these relational Complainers. Note a âfewâ is less than 5 minutes . . . youâre not their counselor.
- Empathize. Simple sentences such as, âThat has got to be tough,â âWow, Iâm glad I donât have that problem,â or âI donât know how you do it,â are sufficient. Also, it may be all the empathy Whiners need. You may hear a Whiner respond, âIt really isnât that bad,â âThanks for listening,â or âSorry. I just needed to vent.â
- Ask for solutions. Ask Whiners for solutions and repeat as needed. Remember, chronic Whiners know that whining gets results. They may need several exposures to âWow. What are you going to do about that?â before taking the hint that you arenât the best place to deposit their problems.
How to Stop a Whiner Boss
Human Beings, not Beans
How to Stop a Whiner Peer
Soap Opera Life
Table of contents
- Cover
- Contents
- Title
- Copyright
- Dedication
- Work Drama 101
- Introduction: How to Use This Book with No Complaints
- Chapter 1: Whiners
- Chapter 2: Complicators
- Chapter 3: Prima Donnas
- Chapter 4: Controllers
- Chapter 5: Toxics
- Chapter 6: What to Do If Youâre the Complainer
- Chapter 7: Energy Drains
- Chapter 8: How to Negotiate Work Drama
- Chapter 9: Go Ahead, Complain
- Resources
- References
- Acknowledgments
- About the Author