PART ONE
CLEAN THE MIRROR IMAGE
The first step to becoming an effective leader is to look in the mirror. Master the art of leading yourself and you will lay the foundation for helping others to do the same.
LOGS BEFORE SPECKS, OR LEAD THYSELF FIRST
Why do you see the speck in your neighborâs eye but do not notice the log in your own eye? Or how can you say to your neighbor, âLet me take the speck out of your eye,â while the log is in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your neighborâs eye. (Matt. 7: 3â5; New Revised Standard Version)
As you consider the above passage, do some leaders you have worked for or people you have worked with come to mind?1 Have you known some irritating hypocrites? This seems to be a common reaction, but perhaps the more important question is, did you consider yourself as one in possible need of the advice offered in the passage? If you did not, then perhaps this passage can be especially helpful to you.
Letâs think for a minute. Would you like to become an effective leader? Would you like to have a significant and positive impact on others, on the world, or on history? Jesus provides some striking advice for moving toward this end. One of his key lessons suggests that if you want to lead others you should firstâdo what? Become more commanding so that you can bend the will of others to your own? No, thatâs not it. Work on your charisma so you can inspire others to do what you want? No, again. Develop the ability to identify what people want and provide it as an incentive for complying with what you lead them to do? No, thatâs not it either. Learn how to uncover the shortcomings of others and berate them for their failures until they do what you demand of them? No, no, no! All of these things may enable you to influence others, at least in the short run, but they just do not provide the proper foundation for effective leadership. The first step, Jesus seems to say, is to look in the mirror.
Usually when we think about leadership we think about one person (the leader) influencing someone else (the follower). In fact, when we are in a position of leadership it is typical to think that our job is to tell others what to do. That is, leaders are expected to evaluate others and tell them how they need to change and improve, and ultimately those others are expected to do what theyâre told.
Jesusâ teachings, conversely, give rise to a quite different view of how we should approach the subject of leadership. We are challenged first to examine ourselves and get our own act together before we try to lead others. This is a hard lesson to learn. It is so tempting to want to skip this step. After all, pointing out the problems that other people have and providing the answers to their problems can be very gratifying; so can directing and commanding others at our whim. It can make us feel competent, special, and even superior.
âFirst take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your neighborâs eye.â This is a haunting phrase. It suggests that the very fact that we believe we know what is wrong with others, that we have the answer to their problems, and that we should direct them to our solution is a problem in itself. It is a log that can blind us to our own shortcomings. Jesus points out that we are focusing on othersâ specksârelatively minor problemsârather than on our own large log, that we are ignoring our own log by presuming that we should direct and control others when we havenât even bothered to explore our own humanness and shortcomings. In that sense we are truly blinded by the gratifying feeling of power over others that enables us to forget how flawed, how messed up we ourselves are. Careful self-examination and a sincere willingness to seek ways of improving ourselves provide the foundation for effective leadership. When we donât engage in this honest self-evaluation and corrective process, we set ourselves up for doing more harm than good.
All this does not mean that it is never appropriate to try to influenceâto leadâothers. On the contrary, providing constructive, effective, ethical leadership is one of the greatest acts of service we can perform (more on leadership as service later). But leadership of others needs to come from an honest appreciation of our own humannessâfrom a sound, caring base of humility and a practical understanding of the unique human struggle that each of us faces as we try to be right with our life and the world. Jesus points to a kind of leadership that recognizes the value of each person and is exercised out of a sense of caring and commitment to the well-being of those being led. It also recognizes that each of us is ultimately our own leader when leadership is performed on a higher spiritual plane.
I have found this personal struggle to direct and motivate ourselves constructively to be at the heart of the search for a full and satisfactory life. In my own consulting and executive development work it has been humbling to realize that often things go much better the less I try to direct and âlead.â Frequently my best work has resulted from simply listening sincerely and helping my clients figure out what is best for themselvesâthat is, helping and allowing them to solve their own problems. When I try to be wise and expert and force all my concepts, ideas, and knowledge into my service, I interfere with my clientsâ self-discovery. Worse, at times I completely miss the boat and get bogged down with my own opinions and view of the world.
I have learned that the best consultants are the ones who recognize how limited their knowledge really is, who continually learn and improve themselves, and most of all, who recognize that the real experts are usually the clients, who have to live with their problems every day. The trick is for the consultant to remove, or neutralize as much as possible, their own blinders (logs) and help clients sort through the often tiny specks that are blocking their own barely hidden solutions. I believe that the same principle applies to almost anyone leading or helping someone else: be humble and assume that most people know a heck of a lot more about their problem than you do.
By becoming more effective in our own self-leadership not only do we gain greater insight and empathy for others, who also struggle to make good choices and improve themselves, but we also serve as a model, which is central to leadership. Being a model in this sense does not mean that we want others to imitate and be exactly like us. Rather, we can serve as an example of someone who has sincerely struggled with being personally effective and has found his or her own way. As a result we are in a better position to help others find their own way as well. On occasion when I finish a training program or a consulting project the client says to me something like, âYou really practice what you preach. You got us to solve our own problem.â For me that is the greatest compliment I can receive as a consultant.
The powerful leadership lesson that Jesus teaches us is that if we donât take the important step of looking in the mirror and examining and leading ourselves first, we can be blinded by this shortcoming. It is as though we have a big wood sliverâindeed, a logâin our eye so that we cannot see others clearly. First remove the log and get right with yourself, then serve as an example and source of help (leadership) for others.
The primary prerequisites for leadership and for administering cardiopulmonary resuscitation (CPR) contain some insightful similarities. Obviously we need to be alive, conscious, and breathing before we start trying to revive others through CPR. Similarly, living and leading ourselves properly is like the breath that sustains our ability to lead others and to guide them on how to work and live. Many people believe that leadership is restricted to an outward influence process that requires leaders to lead and followers to follow, and that leadership is not something we can do for ourselves. On the contrary, leaders and followers form an organic whole that is required for leadership to unfold, and at the very core of the leadership process leaders and followers are one and the same. We can and do lead ourselves. Self-leadership is the breath, and without it the leader is in need of some serious leadership CPR.
That brings us back to Jesusâ lesson of logs before specks. How can people expect to lead others effectively if they wonât take the timeâin fact, if they refuse to make an effortâto live their own lives (to lead themselves) positively and constructively first? According to Jesus they cannot. To do so is like trying to carry on without taking the time to breathe.
TO BECOME AN EFFECTIVE LEADER FOR OTHERS, FIRST LEARN TO LEAD YOURSELF
THE LAST SHALL BE FIRST
He asked them, âWhat were you arguing about on the way?â But they were silent, for on the way they had argued with one another who was the greatest. He sat down, called the twelve, and said to them, âWhoever wants to be first must be last of all and servant of all.â (Mark 9: 33â35)
Jesus took a surprising and fascinating approach to the topic of achieving fame and glory. In fact, he suggested that the only sure way to become great is to seek just the opposite. He taught that if you want to come in first, then purposely put yourself last. He directed that we should become last of all and the servant of all. That is an awfully hard pill for most of us to swallow. Much that we have learned about human nature suggests how important it is to build up our self-esteem and our belief in ourselves. In this spirit the virtues of accomplishment in athletics, academics, work, and so forth have been prescribed as healthy medicine for our psyche. The right to say, âIâm number one!â has become a compulsive quest for millions around the world.
Yet Jesus says, donât aim to be first; be last. What gives? I donât think Jesus is recommending that we should strive for mediocrity, or that we should waste rather than develop and apply our talents. Indeed, fruitfully using our gifts in constructive ways is a common theme throughout the Bible. But Jesus sends a clear message that we should not exaggerate our sense of superiority, that we should not become too caught up in our own importance. Most of all, he seems to be saying that those who are directly striving to be great as an end in itself are going at it the wrong way. Be humble and donât be a conceited self-advocate; be a servant and strive to put others firstâthis is the path to greatness, though often camouflaged and hard to see, that Jesus prescribes. Of course Jesus was especially concerned with greatness in a spiritual sense, in terms of Godâs realm, and not so much in a worldly sense. Nevertheless, the philosophy he advocatedâhumility, service, forgivenessâcan lead to the kind of respect and love from others that many view as the real signs of âgreatness.â
Jesus went even further in his instructions to the disciples:
The disciples came to Jesus and asked, âWho is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?â He called a child, whom he put among them, and said, âTruly I tell you, unless you change and become like children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Whoever becomes humble like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.â (Matt. 18: 1â4)
The idea of becoming like a child will likely affect readers in a variety of ways. Certainly the idea of becoming passive and naive will not strike many as particularly constructive. The important lesson that I take from this passage, however, is the idea of becoming âhumble like this child.â Again, this means resisting the temptation to become too full of ourselves, puffed up with an exaggerated sense of self-importance. Of course a variety of other positive images can be gleaned from mounting research that points to the positive benefitsâincreased health, creativity, ability to learn, and so onâof regaining some of our ability to be like children (playful, lighthearted, and inquisitive). Jesusâ ideas run counter to many hardened adultsâ natural tendencies to become cynical, closed off, and self-centered in an increasingly complex and stressful world.
On another occasion, when Jesus attended what apparently was a formal dinner at the home of an important man, he used the opportunity to teach further. This time he seemed to suggest that being recognized as important is not all bad, but it needs to be based on a solid foundation of humility.
When he noticed how the guests chose the places of honor, he told them a parable. âWhen you are invited by someone to a wedding banquet, do not sit down at the place of honor, in case someone more distinguished than you has been invited by your host; and the host who invited both of you may come and say to you, âGive this person your place,â and then in disgrace you would start to take the lowest place. But when you are invited, go and sit down at the lowest place, so that when your host comes, he may say to you, âFriend, move up higherâ; then you will be honored in the presence of all who sit at the table with you. For all who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.â (Luke 14: 7â11)
Most people appreciate those who donât emphasize their own accomplishments and status. This is especially true when that person does have the power or recognition to command the attention of others. We all want to feel OK about ourselves, and being around persons of some notoriety and power can provoke difficult emotional reactions. If they flaunt their status, we may feel inadequate or angry at their pretentious behavior. Conversely, if they act with humility and greet others with respect, we are able to enjoy their prestige and status. It is as though we share in it and experience it vicariously ourselves. Jesusâ dinner story drives this lesson home vividly so that we are able to come face to face with the powerful correlation between humility and greatness.
When I reflect on these ideas I canât help but think of Donald Petersen, who led the Ford Motor Company at a crucial time in the organizationâs history. He became CEO in the wake of very high-profile leaders, including Henry Ford II and Lee Iacocca. It was difficult for many people to think of his name, and it was not unusual for newspapers to misspell it. As a leader he preached empowerment, teamwork, trust, cooperation, and the importance of every employee.1 He openly confessed to enjoying his lack of star status. âWe donât want starsâŚ. Being part of a team is a much more productive environment. I feel very comfortable with the lack of spotlight and limelight.â2
As an example of the positive leadership that Petersen brought to Ford, Jack Telnack, Fordâs chief of design when Petersen was president, told the following story: After looking over a design, Petersen asked Telnack if the car depicted was the kind of car he would like to drive. Telnack pondered the question and decided to answer honestly: âAbsolutely not. I wouldnât want that car parked in my driveway.â Petersen then asked him to design something he would be proud of. The phenomenally successful rounded âjelly beanâ cars (such as the Taurus) resulted. After years of autocratic leadership, Telnackâs chance to do some self-leading had finally come at Ford, and he responded with one of the most successful designs in automotive history.3
This humble leader was indeed a key component of Fordâs turnaround in the early to mid-1980s. And despite Petersenâs low-profile style and avoidance of the spotlight, by focusing on others rather than on himself (his choice of humble seating), he was awarded a place of ho...