Mentor Myth

How to Take Control of Your Own Success

Debby Carreau

• Publisher: Routledge
• Year: 2016
• ISBN:
  9781351861359
• Edition: 1
• Topic: Commerce
• Subtopic: Commerce Général

Mentors are over-utilized, under-trained and, as studies show, under-deliver. From an employer's perspective, assigning a mentor is often a band-aid to a larger problem. From an employee's perspective, a lack of formal mentorship is seen as a serious, career-inhibiting problem, the equivalent of sailing a boat without a rudder. In The Mentor Myth, Debby Carreau represents this dichotomy, explaining that while a mentor's counsel can be invaluable, it is not the silver bullet human resources professionals often purport it to be. The opinions of a mentor are one data point, one piece in the much more complex game of navigating a career. In fact, the increasing overreliance on mentorship can actually be a hindrance to a successful career. Instead of continually looking outward for career guidance, aspiring professionals must realize that they possess all the tools necessary to take control of their own careers by using their own strengths, capabilities, and visions of success. Through her years of experience consulting, speaking, and writing about career development, Debby has created a comprehensive, easy-to-implement guide for taking ownership of your professional success. Debby begins by helping the reader create a professional roadmap, including how to build a personal brand, project the right amount of confidence, and manage time. She addresses mentors in the context of networks and sponsors, advising the reader how to incorporate outward influences rather than be defined by them.

Chapter 1
Taking Control of Your Career

What do you want to be when you grow up? Kids are fixated by this question, and, despite limited life experience, they usually have a clear answer. For example, my seven-year-old daughter wants to be a dolphin trainer by day and a doctor on the side. My son would like to be a sports announcer. That sounds more realistic than a dolphin trainer but I'm not counting on his career goal panning out, considering that he had a totally different answer last week—and a different one the week before that. We've run through everything from a cashier at A&W to president of the United States. But this constant evolution isn't a bad thing. In fact, adults could learn a thing or two from kids' focus on their future career—especially from the way their goals adapt based on their changing interests and on what they learn about the world.

Having a goal in mind becomes much more important as you begin to train and plan for your career. Most people spend more time working than they do with their spouse, kids, and friends, so your career shouldn't be an afterthought. I believe you can't be successful without an idea of where you are going; very few people accidentally find themselves CEO of a Fortune 500 company Can you think of one corporate leader who attributes his success to just having showed up? Even tech company founders, who seem more focused on building cool stuff than building companies, had an idea that their product could catch on and worked obsessively toward its success.

Being a Fortune 500 CEO might not be your vision of success, but if you are reading this book, you are professionally ambitious. Ambition needs direction. Getting what you want in life, professionally and personally, requires knowing what you want. The earlier you can define that vision, the better. Granted, this vision might change over time. It could even change radically as you realign priorities. But before you lean in, you have to have an idea of what you are leaning into.

The tricky part is, I find that people don't put much effort into career planning. In my experience, they tend to let their next steps be defined by managers, or they just put their heads down and work really hard, hoping someone will notice them. When it comes to promotion, most of us are presented with a plan and then follow it. Ironically, research suggests this might have something to do with behavior learned in school—we are rewarded for following directions with good grades and positive attention.¹ We get points for getting everything right, not for taking risks or making mistakes. Very little about this operative strategy translates into getting ahead in your career.

To further complicate matters, millennials (the generation born after 1982)² are expected to stay in jobs less than three years—meaning they will hold fifteen to twenty jobs during the course of their careers.³ Even if you have a well-thought-out plan in place, how do you anticipate every one of those transitions? And if you don't do any planning, what happens to you? The chances of ending up in a profession you don't want to be in seem infinitely higher. Navigating a modern career seems to require the skill of a chess master, looking many moves ahead at any given time.

The conclusion here is that a successful career requires both planning and flexibility, two elements that at first glance seem diametrically opposed. But a closer look reveals that, in real life, the two are complements. You can't be expected to plot your exact career trajectory and later be totally comfortable when your dreams get blown up by a recession or the arrival of a child. What I am advocating is that you have an idea of where you are going and be willing to accept that your vision might change as life changes around you.

The good news is that better career planning is not dependent on input from other people, so you can set the mentor myth aside: you have control over whether you are thoughtful about your next career steps. You decide if you are going to have a long-term, strategic professional plan in place.

My intent is to help you think about the kind of life you want and how you will make that happen. Keep in mind that none of this advice is about finding that next rung on the corporate ladder. This chapter is meant to help you navigate the road map of your career with easy practical steps; you need to define what success looks like and then align that vision of success with the career and lifestyle you would like to have.

The Career Exploration Tool

I wish I were able to go back and give my twenty-year-old self some practical career advice. While I ended up on a career trajectory I am proud of, I could have gotten there much earlier if I'd paid more attention to where I was going. After two decades in human resources, I have a much more nuanced perspective of what it takes to make a well-considered career plan.

When coaching people on their careers, I focus on six elements: passion, lifestyle, values, economics, skill, and demand. Thinking strategically about each of these elements lets you create a framework for a solid career map. And no matter where you are in your career (university, new grad, or seasoned veteran of the workforce), this tool is relevant. We can all make adjustments to either refine our vision, if we like where we are going, or radically change our plan, if we are unhappy. This tool helps you consider your professional journey from every angle, and it is worth revisiting often as you navigate your way to your professional goals.

Passion

In my HR consulting practice, I find that the average person spends 50 percent of her waking hours working, commuting, thinking about work, or returning texts, e-mails, and phone calls related to work. If you are a career-oriented person or a business owner, this percentage is probably even higher (and let's face it, some of us probably never entirely stop thinking about work). Chapter 3 will focus explicitly on time management, but the reality is that working takes up a majority of your time no matter how well you manage your day If you spend all day disliking what you do, you will find it hard to motivate yourself to work hard enough to be successful.

In the last few years there has been some criticism of "following your passion," most notably by Cal Newport in his 2012 book So Good They Can't Ignore You: Why Skills Trump Passion in the Quest for Work You Love. The gist of this argument is that following a preexisting interest is not the best way to ensure you find your job satisfying. Instead, he says, you build passion as you become skilled at your job. It's human nature to like the things we're good at, so it is better to pursue careers within our natural abilities, whether or not we like them.

This is an interesting argument and probably mostly true. Every job will have disagreeable elements. However, having natural passion about some part of your career is pretty important. Even if you don't love your job, you have to like it. Research shows that happy workers are more productive workers.⁴ You will be less likely to resent the time you spend at work and you will be more motivated to work hard if you are passionate about the mission of your job.

Following a preexisting interest (such as art, hockey, or skydiving) is also far more practical if you have a strategy in place for turning that interest into a monetizable career (there's a great book that incorporates this idea, Finding Your Element by educator Ken Robinson). If you want to be a writer, be realistic that this isn't initially (and may never be) a high-earning career. Have a clear plan in place for how you are going to support yourself while you are getting off the ground, as well as a backup plan for lean times.

The inverse of "don't follow your passion" is definitely true: don't do things you hate. I am sure there are people who are mercenary enough to suffer through high-earning jobs that are a daily misery—but I haven't met them. Every successful person I have worked with in my career has been energized by her job. It sounds trite, but when you like what you do, it often doesn't feel like work. Running my own business focused on creating great workplaces makes me excited to get going every day. That said, there are aspects of the business I don't enjoy: doing payroll and proofreading training materials are two of my least favorite tasks because, frankly, I'm not the best in the world at them. The solution: I hire people who do enjoy and excel at those two functions. The job gets done much better than I would have done it, and I don't have to suffer through it myself!

Also, note that your passion may not align with the salary you would like to earn (more on this in the next section). If that's the case, plenty of people find work they enjoy, and they follow their passion as a hobby. I know many successful businesspeople who are high earners and teach spin or other fitness classes for fun in their spare time. Plenty of other professionals I have come across blog, teach, or run side businesses that allow them to explore an interest that couldn't support them as a primary career.

Lifestyle

As you form your career goals, think about the kind of lifestyle you envision yourself having when you are older. This consideration has several elements, from your socioeconomic status to the level of flexibility you would like in your daily life. What kind of house would you like to live in? How many hours per week would you like to spend working? Are you willing to forgo free time for financial gain? Many professions that sounded appealing to you when you were ten or sixteen won't align with your vision of a successful life later on. Some of these careers are more whimsical—like being an exotic animal trainer or an astronaut—and a little maturity shows us that these are impractical lifestyles for most of us.

The concept of flexibility also applies to where you would like to live and how much you would like to travel. Jobs in sales generally require quite a bit of weekly travel, even at high levels. Banking or management positions at multinational corporations can mean moving around in order to get promotions. Are you willing to move or to spend a lot of time away from home in order to advance?

The key is to define what success means to you. In interviews I conducted with successful professionals at all levels, the idea that success has varying definitions was a common theme. Most of these people acknowledged that "life balance" was a tenuous concept. Having both a fulfilling personal and professional life is tough, and means making continuous trade-offs in order to keep it all going. If you can define at the outset your baseline level of success in each category, you can retain a little sanity.

This means asking yourself tough questions. Does success mean making lots of money? Does it mean a high-profile position? Does it mean getting to spend every summer with your children? Are you flexible on the hours you want to work, the location where you want to live, and the distance you want to commute? Your answers to these questions may change, but spend some time thinking about them now. It's a shame to put in years of work only to hit a glass ceiling when you realize you're not willing to move to Hong Kong to get that next promotion.

Weighing Professions

Maya was a talented, passionate ballet dancer with amazing stage presence, and she had a real shot at becoming a professional ballerina after she graduated from high school. Shortly before graduation, her mother sat her down and said, "Maya, you are a wonderful ballerina, and if you choose to pursue dancing professionally I will be behind you 100 percent, but I feel as though I need to make sure you have all the facts so you can make an informed decision." Her mother pulled out their family household budget to show Maya what it cost to support the family. Then she pulled out some salary research that showed what ballerinas earn and how many professional ballerina positions exist nationally. Maya changed her career trajectory, went to law school, and pursued ballet as a hobby. Today, Maya is a mother who works independently as a lawyer so she can dictate her own hours and spend time with her son.

Values

What you choose to do in life will also be influenced by your values. I can't give much advice about those—your values are your own—except to say that it is important to honor your personal values in your profession. There is no quicker way to resent your job than to fundamentally disagree with the mission and ethics of the company you work for.

To avoid professional contexts that would push you to compromise your values, you need to first identify what your values are and decide which are most important to you. Is it important that you work for a company that engages in fair trade, emphasizes environmental practices, or has a religious element? Perhaps you would like to be part of a company that has a strong emphasis on CSR (corporate social responsibility). Maybe you even want to work in a CSR-related function. Whatever the case, your values will inform your own personal mission and passion. The most successful job matches I have seen occur when a person's own mission overlaps with the mission of her company. Don't discount your values when evaluating a career path or employer. Take the time to research industries and companies to see how they fit with your beliefs.

Economics

The career path you choose can dramatically alter your earning potential. Even different functions or positions within the same company can have a material effect on your annual take-home pay CEO-to-worker earning ratios (using salary data for the top three hundred and fifty revenue-producing U.S. companies, excluding Facebook—an outlier due to their high compensation—were 295.9-to-1 in 2013.⁵

Realize, too, that statistics on average earnings don't paint the whole picture. Certain careers are more secure than others. Management tracks with large, stable corporations in growing industries are generally a safe bet as long as you perform at work. Jobs that offer tenure or pensions, like certain teaching positions, are also quite stable. However, to state the obvious, in exchange for stability you usually trade earning potential. As the saying goes, the greater the risk, the greater the reward. Entrepreneurial endeavors or positions in sales may have turbulent earnings periods but could end up paying off in the long run.

I am not saying you must choose the career that offers the most money You need to decide how important making money is to you and then be honest with yourself about whether your desired career can support the lifestyle you would like to have. If you'd like to be a cartoonist, don't count on being able to buy a million-dollar house in the first five years of your career.

If you are consciously choosing a lower-earning career path, educate yourself about managing your personal finances so that you can properly administer your assets and plan for life events like having a baby, sending kids to college, and retiring. In fact, such financial planning is a worthwhile exercise no matter how much money you earn. Plenty of resources exist to help you remedy any gaps in your knowledge (one of my favorites is a book titled Well-Heeled: The Smart Girl's Guide to Getting Rich by my good friend Lesley-Anne Scorgie).

Skill

The role your skill set will play in your career is straightforward: the better you are at what you do, the more successful you will be. Equally obvious, most skills can be improved. If you have a weakness in math or if you would like to be better at public speaking, take a class or seek out a coach. If you are not sure where your weaknesses lie, ask your manager where your skills could be stronger. An even more advanced tool to consider is a 360° feedback assessment that combines the perspectives of supervisors, peers, and your direct reports (if applicable).

Of course, it helps to choose a profession that is a good match for your natural talents. If you are excellent at interacting with people, think about a career in human resources, hospitality or sales. Being naturally good at what you do is energizing and builds confidence, a trait that many people lack in their professional lives.

Keep in mind that no matter how hard you train, you may not be suited for some careers, based on your individual assets and skil...

Table of contents

• Cover
• Half Title
• Title
• Copyright
• Dedication
• Contents
• Introduction: The Mentor Myth
• CHAPTER 1 Taking Control of Your Career
• CHAPTER 2 Laying the Right Foundation: Education and New Jobs
• CHAPTER 3 A Week Is 168 Hours—Use Them Wisely
• CHAPTER 4 Everything Speaks: Personal Brand Matters
• CHAPTER 5 The Four Cs You Won‘t Learn in B-School
• CHAPTER 6 Your Network and Sponsors
• CHAPTER 7 Overpromise, Overdeliver
• CHAPTER 8 Taking Action and Risks
• CHAPTER 9 The Value of Failure and Resilience
• Conclusion
• Notes
• References
• Index
• Acknowledgments
• About the Author