Helping with Behaviour

Establishing the Positive and Addressing the Difficult in the Early Years

Sue Roffey

• Publisher: Routledge
• Year: 2005
• ISBN:
  9781134291588
• Edition: 1
• Topic: Education
• Subtopic: Education General

This book shows how to establish good practice in early years settings so that all children are supported in developing positive interactions with one another.

With limited material available for practitioners in this area, Sue Roffey explains the features of an 'emotionally literate' environment in order to meet the needs of more vulnerable children, and looks at how to respond effectively when children are distressed and hard to manage. She provides a wealth of ideas and inspiration throughout, using down-to-earth language, and looks at:

• how to foster language and build self-esteem
• how to help pre-schoolers learn to feel good about complying and co-operating
• how children can become strong individuals as well as learn to be good
• how to identify more worrying behaviour and when to refer to other professionals.

Based on sound psychological theory and research and packed full of practical activities, illustrations, support and advice, this will be an invaluable source of inspiration for anyone concerned with providing the best environment for vulnerable young children in their care.

Chapter 1

A privilege and a responsibility

The importance and skills of practitioners and good practice in early years settings are vital in reducing social exclusion. How we talk and think about children and their behaviour matters. Solution-focused, systemic and contextual approaches are more helpful.There are no quick fixes: it is the whole package over time that makes the difference and relationships are central. We need to work systemically, consistently and supportively. Social and emotional competence is central to a child’s ability to achieve academically and to the development of socially responsible behaviour.

INTRODUCTION

More than at any other age, those who work with children in the early years hold the future in their hands and in their hearts. Research continually emphasizes the importance of the first few years of a child’s life. Early experiences and relationships at home and in pre-school settings set the stage for the development of crucial competencies such as selfregulation, empathy and interpersonal skills – all of which impact on future relationships and how an individual functions in the world (National Research Council and Institute of Medicine 2000).

It is here, in the first few years of life, that children learn ways of interpreting experience – making sense of the world and themselves in it. These interpretations underpin patterns of responding that become more established with age. These include:

• The development of self-concept – how children come to see themselves.
• The development of self-esteem – whether or not they have positive feelings about themselves.
• The development of self-efficacy – whether they believe they can have an impact on their world.
• Their understanding of relationships – what they learn about others and their interactions with them.
• Their general conceptualizations of the world around them and the meanings that are given to various aspects of existence. This includes whether they see the world as an exciting place to explore or a scary place in which you either don’t take risks or fight for survival.

What matters most is what the significant people in children’s lives say and do. In this first instance these are the child’s immediate carers, usually their family. We know, however, that a ‘significant other’ in a child’s life is a major factor in their resilience (Raphael 2000). These people can be extended family members such as grandparents but can also include teachers. It is the quality of the relationship that is important. If a child has the experience of being valued and supported by someone they will know they have the potential for being lovable.

Relationship building and maintenance is integral throughout this book. We look at what behaviours might mean and how to respond with care and consistency to help children believe they are important and wanted – even when we are letting them know that their behaviour is unacceptable. We explore ways of helping children learn to think and feel about themselves positively and see cooperation as in their interests. We consider how to respond in developmentally sensitive ways that facilitate self-awareness and ‘other’ awareness. We honour each child’s individuality and celebrate their strengths while helping them become more successful in their endeavours to learn and relate more effectively.

Those who work in the early years need to support the process of socialization, helping children become less egocentric and increasingly effective in a social world. Chapter 2 is about how young children come to understand what is required of them in behavioural terms. How do they learn what ‘good’ means and how can we help them begin to internalize pro-social values rather than just doing as they are told for fear of getting into trouble if they don’t? How can we foster individual strengths but also ensure that qualities such as high energy, determination and independence are channelled into productive outcomes for the child and for others?

Chapter 3 provides practical guidance for teachers on what needs to be taken into consideration in promoting ‘desired’ behaviour, together with initial responses to children who are behaving in ways which are hurtful or unhelpful. The principles here apply to all children but especially those learning ways of being in pre-school settings which are different from the expectations at home. This guidance is congruent with and underpins responses to more distressed children.

Although it is threaded throughout the book, emotional literacy is the specific focus for Chapter 4. This looks at what is involved in constructing an ethos which is emotionally safe and where children feel they belong. We also explore practical ways of helping children develop the emotional competencies that enhance resilience.

Chapter 5 covers the developmental issues in the pre-school years that impact on understanding and learning. A high proportion of the children whose behaviour gives cause for serious concern in the early years have difficulties with cognition and/or communication and it is important to identify these and take appropriate action.

Responding with emotional literacy and professional integrity to those who have faced distressing events in their young lives is the focus of Chapter 6. This covers the more challenging and possibly entrenched situations where children have experienced loss, abuse or other trauma.

Chapter 7 begins by providing a framework for responding to a high level of emotion and then addresses specific behaviours that may be especially difficult or disturbing and how to gather good information to inform further assessments.

Chapter 8 addresses issues in working with families. Blaming stressed, under-resourced parents for lacking the knowledge and skills to respond effectively to their children is a road to nowhere. Conversations need to be solution focused and strengths based.

The final chapter focuses on helping early years professionals weather the inevitable struggles by looking after themselves and supporting each other. Promoting well-being for everyone is not just a warm and fuzzy idea – it makes all the difference to what is possible in maintaining good practice (Weare and Gray 2003).

WAYS OF THINKING ABOUT CHILDREN AND BEHAVIOUR

How we think about children, their families, our role and how we support each other all contribute to the hopefulness or helplessness we feel when faced with behaviour we find really hard to manage.

Often we see difficult behaviour as rooted within the child – what they can’t or won’t do. This way of thinking is referred to in various ways as:

• the ‘medical’ model: diagnose the problem and provide ‘treatment’;
• the ‘within child’ model: the problem exists within the child who needs to change;
• the ‘individual deficit’ or ‘pathological’ model: focusing on the child’s faults and failures.

This way of thinking is not responsive to the whole child nor to the whole context in which behaviour is manifest. Although factors within the individual child might be part of a holistic response, by itself the medical model limits positives, possibilities and responsibilities. It also gives rise to a simplistic ‘cause and effect’ way of thinking when human beings and their situations are invariably much more complex. There is a danger within this model that children are seen to be deliberately difficult and challenging to adults rather than responding to experiences and needing support to develop pro-social behaviour.

Seeing children’s behaviour as the family’s fault is understandable and probably an even more common attribution. It is, however, no more useful than focusing entirely on the child.

We cannot do anything ourselves to change the child’s family or history. We cannot change their personality or indeed any special needs they may have. All we can change are the approaches and contexts over which we have some control.

Change will happen as a result of how we think about an issue and what we do or don’t do as an outcome of that thinking. This includes our own values and beliefs, how we understand the meaning of behaviours, how we determine what is in the child’s best interests and what we need as practitioners. This guides what we might do individually and collaboratively to maximize optimal outcomes.

This book is written from the stance of theoretical models considered to be both more useful to practitioners and also more respectful and empowering to children and families.These are briefly summarized here.

Interactive systems theory (also referred to as eco-systemic theory)

Each individual is born with a different personality and a different potential. It is the interaction of this individuality with their environment that influences how they develop. Although the greatest influence on the child is their immediate daily caregivers, the way parents learn to be with their child comes from their own experiences, their extended family and their community. The support families receive from both friends and services impacts on how well they function as parents, as do family-friendly policies in the workplace. The laws of the country and the values and norms that underpin these are also powerful influences. Many of the issues that present difficulties are at the interface of different systems where adaptations are required to meet unfamiliar or incongruent expectations (Foot et al. 2004). This means that whether a family has the same or different values as their child’s early years centre or school will impact on relationships (Bronfenbrenner 1979, 2004).

Changes both within and between systems have a ripple effect. If we focus on gaining success with one behaviour and acknowledge the child’s achievements they may begin to think of themselves differently and behaviour may begin to improve in other areas. If we support rather than blame a struggling mother, she is less likely to feel stressed and more able to relate positively to her child, who will develop more optimally as a result. The same theory applies to early years practitioners. If individuals come into work knowing they are valued by their colleagues they are likely to have more emotional energy to relate to children effectively in challenging circumstances.

The eco-systemic model helps us to both reserve judgement on families and give confidence in knowing that what we do in our own settings may help make up for disadvantages elsewhere.

In certain ecologies, overarching forces, outside the control of parents, may entirely overwhelm the beneficial effects of authoritative parenting in the home. In other contexts, beneficial forces outside the family may offset what otherwise might be disastrous parenting.

(Steinberg et al. 1995: 461)

Social constructionist theory

This theory emphasizes the importance of meaning and how people have different ‘realities’ based in ‘dominant discourses’ or how people talk about things. A good example is the construct of ‘success’ in Western society. Most people do not question that success means getting a ‘good’ job, having money and enjoying status. This is presented by markets, media, and government policies, and perpetuated by conversations. Success in other cultures or at other times in history is linked to different values, such as supporting the extended family or having a spiritual life.

What social constructionist thinking means for working effectively with young children is that it encourages us to challenge our own ‘givens’ in thinking about children and their families. Suspending our own assumptions may provide insight into understanding what meanings specific behaviours might have for someone else’s reality (Billington 2000; Laws and Davies 2000).

How children and families are discussed among the staff in your centre will be a way of ‘constructing’ how you perceive them (Roffey et al. 2000c). If everyone talks about a child as ‘aggressive’ then behaviours will be interpreted as such.This impacts both on responses to the child and on conversations with parents.‘Co-constructing’ reality means careful listening and observation to discover what a behaviour means (Roffey 2002).

CASE STUDY

Jessie was always in trouble in the playground for screaming, pushing and kicking other children. A close observation showed that children were excluding her from games and that her behaviour was a distressed reaction. Staff had seen only one side of the interaction and Jessie was being blamed. The problem was therefore self perpetuating and needed adult intervention so that Jessie could be included.

Social constructionist theory also helps construct alternative realities for children by offering them opportunities to develop different stories to make sense of the world. Narrative therapy, which is based in social constructionist thinking, focuses on the relationship that a person has with a problem rather than seeing the person as the problem. Some early years teachers do this naturally: Well, Mr Grumpy seems to have got hold of you this morning, Michael. Is he stopping you enjoying yourself?

Social learning theory

This theory originating with Alfred Bandura (1971) says that all behaviour is learnt, and takes account of the many factors involved in this learning. Early years teachers are well placed to adopt this theory as it replicates much of what they will have in place for learning within the academic curriculum.

Social learning theory places a strong emphasis on modelling. Children copy what they see and hear. This is vitally important in thinking about behaviour. Those tiny tots whose mouths are full of obscenity are only copying what they have heard. Being outraged at such behaviour is out of place. Children need to be told each time that these words are not used here in this centre.

Social learning theory also focuses on the need to ‘scaffold’ learning so that it builds on what someone already knows and helps them make sense of it. It also ensures that targets are within reach so that a child can feel successful and motivated to go further. Vygotsky (1978) calls this the ‘zone of proximal development’ sometimes referred to as ‘working in the tomorrow of the child’. It involves identifying emergent behaviours (what the child can do with help) in order to scaffold learning towards independence (what a child can do without help).

Learning theory also helps us to understand that there are different levels of learning and if we target teaching at the appropriate level the child will be more successful:

• The first step is ‘Acquisition’ – learning something new for the first time. This requires interactive teaching – being shown and helped to understand.
• Next comes ‘Rehearsal’ – this requires opportunities to practise the new skill – usually in structured settings with constructive feedback.
• ‘Adaptation’ is where the skill is applied in a new situation.
• ‘Generalization’ is the ability to be flexible and adaptive with the skill across a range of situations.
• ‘Fluency’ is the ability to apply the skill in all relevant situations without having to think too hard about it.

For adults you can see how this would apply to learning a new language – or learning to drive, something they have probably chosen to do.Think for a moment about a child learning a new social skill – perhaps to take turns in a group situation. Not only might it be quite a challenging process that takes some time to achieve, but the teacher also needs to encourage the motivation to want to learn these skills.This will be based in r...

Table of contents

• Cover Page
• Title Page
• Copyright Page
• Preface
• Acknowledgements
• Chapter 1
• Chapter 2
• Chapter 3
• Chapter 4
• Chapter 5
• Chapter 6
• Chapter 7
• Chapter 8
• Chapter 9
• Bibliography