Hunch
eBook - ePub

Hunch

  1. 72 pages
  2. English
  3. ePUB (mobile friendly)
  4. Available on iOS & Android
eBook - ePub

Hunch

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About This Book

Meet Hunch. The Superhero. Coming to the rescue when you've splinters on your arse from sitting on the fence. Making decisions to save the lives of others, she must start calling the shots to save her own. Hunch is a new dark comedy about the power of gut decisions, written and performed by Kate Kennedy.

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Information

Publisher
Oberon Books
Year
2018
ISBN
9781786826138
Edition
1
Topic
Literature
Subtopic
British Drama
Index
Literature

1. HUNCHCHELLA PART ONE

HUNCH is waiting backstage.
Music.
HUNCH accepts her award on stage.
HUNCH: I have no words.
Words areā€¦
HUNCH opens her mouth widely to try and summon words.
Me. Me. Me.
Thereā€™s not many heroes who can say theyā€™ve saved Hum and everyone in it.
Fasten your seatbelts, civilians. Itā€™s Hunch.
She does the HUNCH symbol.

2. HUNCHILDA

A year earlier. UNAā€™s twenty-seventh birthday.
UNA: I hate occasions.
I know normal days. I know where everyone is, where theyā€™re about to go, what time I can go to sleep. Occasions are pranks.
Birthdays are bullies.
UNA, zero years old, being born in hospital.
MUM: Why she not coming out, Larry? Pull her out with a fucking crane if you have to!
DAD: Oh sheā€™s come out love. Oh, sheā€™s in, sheā€™s out. Oh. Sheā€™s in.
MUM: This is a home birth Larry, not The Vagina Open.
DAD: Love, sheā€™s stopped halfway.
UNA: The first five years were full of too much learning. As soon as Iā€™d get the hang of something, I was either ā€˜too bigā€™ or ā€˜too oldā€™ so it had to (shudder) change.
UNA, six years old. MUM whispers to NATHAN, UNAā€™s brother.
MUM: (To NATHAN.) You might think that the claw will grab the toy, but itā€™s an illusion Nathan, okay?
(To UNA.) Your brother is taking you birthday bowling, Una!
In bowling alley.
NATHAN: Just pick a ball, Una. Theyā€™re all the same ā€“ just different colours. Grab, poke, chuck ā€“ (Strike.) Wicked.
UNA canā€™t pick.
Just knock one over or Mumā€™ll make me take you to the cinema.
UNA really canā€™t pick. She panics over the choice. Sees the pins. Runs towards them. Fiercely kicks them one by one.
Woah ā€“ woah ā€“ woah ā€“ UNA!
UNA: School, I got used to. Wore the same thing everyday. Slept in my uniform. Ate only browns and greens.
Routine was my soulmate. And Jools.
JOOLS: Happy 13th Birthday Una Balloona! Make a wish!
UNA canā€™t decide.
Oh. Thatā€™s okay, Iā€™ll do it. Letā€™s wish Mark from 7b discovers a razor for his bumfluff.
UNA nods.
Happy 16th Birthday Una Balloona! Make a wā€“!
UNA canā€™t decide and her tummy hurts.
Woah ā€“ are you alright? Iā€™ll have it too and then we can both go home early.
(Phone message.) Happy 18th Birthday Una!
Sorry Iā€™m late ā€“ I got a bit busy, with a male. Iā€™ll be there in 12 minutes. Love you Una.
UNA: With change came chronic pain. Any exotic change to my routine, any new discovery, surprise or choice made my tummy cramp.
UNA is twenty-seven years old talking to SAM, JOOLSā€™ kid, from the treehouse.
Did you check?
SAM: Yes. Your mum, my mum, two stupid boys. A round yum and one present.
UNA: Nobody else there?
SAM: Nope.
UNA: Good work soldier.
SAM: Why do you have a treehouse when youā€™re so old?
UNA: I only look old because Iā€™m very tall, Sam. Iā€™m actually whatā€™s considered quite young.
Sheā€™s stuck.
Can you help me down?
Wait. Sam.
You need to take a step to the left.
Bird shit.
SAM: Woah! A bird plop! Are you magic?
They knock on the window.
Can we come in yet?
MUM/DAD/JOOLS: Sssssshhhhhhhhhhhhhhh/sheā€™s here, sheā€™s here/right Iā€™ll hide the presents ā€“
SAM: Do they know we can see them?
UNA: Oh yeah, itā€™s the routine. (Pretend.) I wonder where they all are?
The door opens.
NATHAN: HAP...

Table of contents

  1. Front Cover
  2. Half-Title Page
  3. Title Page
  4. Copyright Page
  5. Contents
  6. 1. HUNCHCHELLA PART ONE
  7. 2. HUNCHILDA
  8. 3. HUGEST HUNCH YET
  9. 4. THE TRUNK
  10. 5. THE TESTS
  11. 6. THE INITIATION
  12. 7. THE FIRST SLEEPOVER
  13. 8. THE WELCOME BALL
  14. 9. THE FIRST DAY
  15. 10. THE HOUSEHUNT
  16. 11. THE PHOTOSHOOT
  17. 12. THE MIDDLE TIER
  18. 13. THE HUNCH DOLL
  19. 14. THE HUNCH FANS
  20. 15. THE TIPPING POINT
  21. 16. THE HELP
  22. 17. THE HIGHER TIER
  23. 18. THE WEDDING
  24. 19. THE ANNOUNCEMENT
  25. 20. THE BATTLE
  26. 21. HUNCHELLA PART TWO
  27. 22. THE DRESSING ROOM
  28. 23. THE MAKING IT RIGHT