Solution Focused Coaching for Adolescents

Overcoming Emotional and Behavioral Problems

Caroline Beumer-Peeters

• Publisher: Routledge
• Year: 2021
• ISBN:
  9781000388602
• Edition: 1
• Topic: Psicología
• Subtopic: Psicoterapia

Solution Focused Coaching for Adolescents explains the principles and attitude of the popular 11-step, Mission Possible, Solution Focused Coaching program for working with adolescents.

By comparing the Mission Possible principles with the 'normal' way of problem-solving in coaching scenarios, the author makes the theoretical structure and conversational style of the program easy to learn for professionals. Applied both individually and as a group activity, Mission Possible is a learning experience thatmakes fulfilling dreams and achieving goals easier for teenagers and young adults. It helps to make difficult things accessible for them by using one's own strengths and resources. The book is filled with detailed case studies and useful coaching tools, breaking the program down into five themes, outlining the goals, the process, and any potential pitfalls.

This practical book is intended for coaches, youth counselors, trainers, teachers, mentors, and therapists who want to coach young people using the clear step-by-step Mission Possible-program, and all those working in pastoral roles with children and adolescents.

Chapter 1
Introduction

The Solution Focused approach

Not so long ago, psychology and education worked from a model that was focused on weaknesses, shortcomings, and imperfections in human behavior. The prime focus was on investigating possible causes and ‘repairing’ the damage caused by trauma and congenital abnormalities. In education, the focus was mainly on conditioning and unlearning undesirable behavior. These goals were achieved primarily through correction and punishment.

There was little research on healthy human functioning. Solutions were usually found by trying to understand the negative behavior. As a result, relatively very little was known about the desired healthy behavior.

Fortunately, recent years have seen distinct positive developments in such ways of thinking and working. Thanks to some remarkable pioneers, better alternatives are now available. Originally based on the Solution Focused psychology of Milton Erickson, appreciative inquiry and positive psychology, Mission Possible is such an alternative.

Basics of the Solution Focused model

Actually, the basic principles of the Solution Focused model are relatively simple. Instead of paying attention to the problem the client presents, the Solution Focused coach asks questions about exceptions (to the problem) and looks for any signs of improvement that may already have taken place.

New paradigm

After all, it’s not as if the problem is evident all the time. It is the coach’s job to help define the preferred changes or goals that will alleviate the problem. The coach helps the client to identify any sign of improvement that is already happening. An effective way to achieve this is to help the client describe what happens exactly at those times when the problem does not occur. The only rule without any exception is the rule that there’s always an exception to a problem!

This approach, involving a detailed analysis of what is already going well and what causes it to go well, provides much useful information. This is contrary to the method preferred by many people. Indeed, it is still a global habit to first analyze what is wrong. That’s great when one is suffering from illness or being faced with a technical problem but less effective or even counterproductive when dealing with problems of a more social or psychological nature.

Resource based

The coach helps the client to discover his inner resources and therefore reveal any information that supports him in reaching his goals. Resources are all the abilities and qualities a person has, as well as his previous experiences (good or bad). It doesn’t matter whether these experiences have been successful. They have all, in some way, been educational and have added to the client’s ability to find solutions. The Solution Focused model assumes that clients – whether they are children or adults – already possess all the resources needed to solve their problems. The only thing ‘missing’ is the necessary awareness or insight to apply these resources in that particular situation. The Solution Focused coach helps the client to become aware of these resources and invites him to put this newly acquired awareness into practice. This is how the coach guides the client to bring about the desired changes himself.

Doing what works

There’s no ‘right’ way of looking at things. Different principles and methods can work equally well. The client chooses where to start, and the coach follows. A detailed analysis of the problem and its cause is seldom helpful in finding solutions. Besides, this approach often creates a number of undesirable features such as a negative frame of mind, accusatory statements, and defensive explanations.

The vicious problem circle

In describing the problem and analyzing the underlying causes, automatically, someone or something is found ‘guilty’. If the cause is a person, then emotions immediately start playing their part: the accused feels the need to defend himself. Anyone who has ever found himself at any time in such a situation – and who hasn’t? – knows how challenging it then becomes to work on solutions in a positive state of mind. To a large extent, emotions then determine the further course of the process toward a solution. Emotions limit the creative search for useful solutions, and even then, the search requires a lot of time and energy. Usually in such cases, the best result that may be expected is a compromise, something in the middle that’s acceptable to all involved. After all, everybody should be respected and appeased! Since a compromise is rarely a completely satisfying solution for all parties, there’s a good chance the compromise will result in parts of the problem remaining and new problems arising in the future.

This creates a vicious problem circle:

1. Describing problems
2. Explaining problems and finding causes
3. Using accusatory explanations
4. Defensiveness and counteraccusations (or rejecting responsibility)
5. Creating a bad mood; no willingness to collaborate
6. No creative solutions or just compromises
7. Emergence of lack of progress and new problems
8. Describing and explaining new problems and lack of progress, and so on …

From problem to progress

Figure 1.1 The vicious problem-circle

Source: Modified from: ©Ben Furman & Tapani Ahola, Change through Cooperation: Handbook of Reteaming

Here is a schematic representation of the process in the problem-focused approach, the opposite of the Solution Focused model. This traditional problem-solving model still keeps people around the world trapped on a daily basis, even though Albert Einstein long ago proposed that problems are rarely solved with the same way of thinking that created them. He believed that if you do something that doesn’t work, it is better to stop doing it and do something else instead. This seems in itself very obvious, and yet it is not what usually seems to happen. In 2002, Mark McKergow and Paul Jackson, two brilliant English pioneers in the Solution Focused approach within organizations, added these beautifully concise words: “Change your doing, or change your viewing!” (The Solutions Focus: The simple way to positive change , 2002). Meaning as much as “change what you do, or change the way you look, think and feel.” Allowing yourself simply to look and think in a different way is often enough to see new possibilities. I once heard that Mother Teresa, who during her life took care of the poorest in the slums of Kolkata, was asked in an interview how she could sustain her heavy work. She replied that she saw God in all people, but that in the case of these poor people, God just has a dirty face that needs some loving attention !

Problems compared to solutions

It seems a good idea at the beginning of this book to put both the problem-focused and Solution Focused approach next to each other so the differences become clearly visible.

The first difference to catch your eyes might be that in a problem-focused model, you mainly tend to look at the past. Trying to analyze the problem in search of what caused it to occur, the focus is on what has happened and how things derailed. Therefore, it is hard to withstand the temptation of finding a ‘cause’ and blaming the one who’s responsible.

Analyzing problems ≠ solutions

When children get into arguments, one of the most common things you can hear them say is, “He started it!” But even if ‘he’ indeed started it, which of course is a possibility, things can get really complicated from there. In the argument, blaming and shaming often leads to more than one party being blamed and refusing to take responsibility. Was it the child who first hit the other child? Or was it the child that took the other’s toy in the first place, without asking? Or was it the parent who taught their child to hit another child in an argument? Or could it even have been the children looking on and cheering for one of the fighting parties. By analyzing the past events, you can get into real murky waters trying to figure out who is responsible. In most cases, it will be quite hard to even get the facts straight. Memories are fallible, and perception of the ‘truth’ is in the eye of the beholder. An objective analysis of the event is rarely possible. Ask three children arguing what has happened, and you get three different versions of the story.

Steering away from the past

When looking at this situation from a Solution Focused standpoint, the focus is on what is here now. In the example of the three children, it is three arguing children who seem to disagree on something. When first giving some space for and acknowledgment of all emotions, you almost directly focus on the preferred future. The most relevant question is here: ‘What would the desired situation look like? From where the children are now, what would you and all involved want to see happen instead of the problem?’

Complexity versus simplicity

Instead of controlling the situation, for instance by punishing the children, you try to cooperate and influence the situation. In that way, the children are able to calm down, and because no one is being blamed, it becomes easier to speak about possible positive and useful solutions. Nobody needs to feel personally attacked and have a defensive response. In this way, you prevent ugly complications such as escalating emotions, more accusations, or someone bringing up the past. These things all complicate the problem and the process of solving the situation, as you can see in the mechanism of the ‘vicious problem circle’.

To put it very simply:

• Don’t fix what isn’t broken.
• Find what works, and do more of it.
• Identify what no longer works and stop doing it.
• And do something else instead.

Waiting for the world to change

In the Solution Focused approach, you don’t need to keep yourself occupied with all the deficits and imperfections, and with that, you can almost always bypass any diagnoses.

The latter is something to get used to, both for professionals and for parents. In the current system, professionals often find themselves in a sort of split. They work from the problem focus, which needs the diagnosis as an explanation of the problem. Or they do work Solution Focused, but they still need the diagnosis for official indication purposes to mobilize the required support and get the necessary budget available. Nowadays, this can still lead to awkward situations that hopefully will change in the near future. Until then, professionals working with children and adolescents will unfortunately have to live with this ambiguity.

Putting an end to blame

For the parents of children with problems, the diagnosis often has a completely different meaning. For them, it is an important milestone on the way to recognition of the problem and their need for help. The diagnosis also provides a more tangible explanation for the problem and provides a kind of proof of their innocence. Because of the official diagnosis, they are, at least in part, relieved of feeling like they are bad parents who have failed in raising their child. For most parents, it is very painful to have to admit that their child has problems and they need help in solving the situation that has arisen, which of course is very understandable. Because of the emotional importance often attached to the diagnosis by parents, it is sometimes difficult for them to make the switch to a different focus, away from the problem. When parents meet with a coach who listens attentively and gives them the opportunity to tell their story and share their feelings, so that they feel heard and understood, they will soon feel at ease with the Solution Focused approach. In this way, they can experience that it is also a relief for them to work together with their child to improve the problems. In this cooperation, the participants concentrate on what is goi...

Table of contents

• Cover
• Half Title
• Title Page
• Copyright Page
• Dedication Page
• Contents
• Foreword
• Prologue
• Preface
• 1 Introduction
• 2 A solid platform for motivation
• 3 Getting clear about the goal
• 4 Building trust and self-confidence
• 5 Fostering progress
• 6 Taking action
• 7 Tricks of the coaching trade
• Epilogue
• Supporting literature
• Index