Chapter One
Self-Leadership
Throughout the Bible we find a pattern where God impacts a key leader before He uses that leader to accomplish greater things with the group he leads. When that one leader becomes aligned with God’s vision for His people and confronts those issues that are constraining his leadership potential, positive changes begin to materialize for his tribes.
Before Moses was able to lead a nation of three million made up of the twelve tribes of Israel, he had to have a powerful encounter with the living God. The burning bush had to come before the exodus. Thus, the first step of Israel’s forty-year journey from slavery to the Promised Land began with the work that God first did in one man, Moses.
Year after year the Midianites were terrorizing the tribes of Israel until God changed Gideon. In the beginning Gideon did not see himself as a leader. He protested that he was the least of his family, that his family was the least in his tribe, and his tribe the least in all of Israel. It was only after God was able to change Gideon’s low view of God and himself that He finally convinced Gideon that he was part of the answer to his own prayer of deliverance. Once God worked in the life of Gideon, the children of Israel were able to overcome their nemesis.
Esther, at another time in the history of Israel, was challenged by her uncle to go before her husband, the king, and speak on behalf of the tribes of Israel. Her uncle, Mordecai, helped her see that the sovereign God had used everything that had happened up to that time in her life to put her in a unique position of influence—at just the right season—to provide deliverance for her people. Once Esther caught God’s vision for her life, the tribes of Israel realized theirs.
Most great movements and major victories begin with a stirring in just one heart and small victories in just one life. That is why self-leadership is so important. Leaders will never reach their full potential to impact the tribes around them until they learn to allow God to lead in the small areas of their own lives. This is why the first area of focus for a tribal church leader is on himself and his self-leadership.
The Ten Commitments
Much of what I have learned about self-leadership, I began learning in earnest many years ago when I participated in a mentoring experience led by Bob Shank called “The Master’s Program.” I was part of a group that met for three years, four times a year, for a one-day intensive. In these meetings Bob focused our attention on the need for consistent growth in ten critical areas of life.
1. Spiritual fitness
2. Intellectual fitness
3. Relational fitness
4. Physical fitness
5. Parenting (if applicable)
6. Marriage (if applicable)
7. Personal finances
8. Career success
9. Discipleship of others
10. Personal evangelism
We were challenged over the three-year journey to assess our current reality in light of God’s Word and to make specific, incremental changes, or create holy habits, that would move us toward Christ’s ideal.
Many times we overestimate what we can change in a short period of time and underestimate what we could accomplish applying right habits over the long haul. In looking at the ten realms of self-leadership listed earlier, the key question becomes: To what single area might you give special attention in the next three-to-four months and what specific holy habit might you adopt that would make personal growth more likely?
We all have flaws that need to be addressed, areas in which we need to give God full reign to grow us. David wrote in Psalm 139:23–24, “Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my concerns. See if there is any offensive way in me; and lead me in the everlasting way.”David’s prayer should be our prayer.
Spiritual Fitness
What does spiritual fitness look like? In John 15:8, Jesus said it is the Father’s desire that we “produce much fruit” and so prove to be His disciples. The word fruit in the Bible is used in a couple of ways. First, “fruit” is used to describe the very character of Christ. See the “fruit of the spirit” in Galatians 5:23–24, where nine colors of character paint a portrait of Jesus. Fruit bearing is the result of an ongoing, organic process. The nine attributes of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control are the true marks of Christian maturity. Luke 6:43–44 states, “A good tree doesn’t produce bad fruit; on the other hand, a bad tree doesn’t produce good fruit. For each tree is known by its own fruit.” So any good fruit produced in a true believer’s life comes as a result of a changed nature.
The second way in which “fruit” is used is to describe both physical and spiritual reproduction (see Gen. 9:1, Rom. 1:13, and 1 Cor. 16:15). A believer is fruitful not simply when Christ’s character is visible, but also when Christ’s mission is accomplished. Spiritual fitness is thus about being formed into the “likeness of Christ.” Then, as we live in such a way that Christ is incarnated in our daily lives, “He is lifted up,” and others are drawn into a relationship with Him.
So, two simple questions get to the heart of spiritual fitness:
1. Am I more like the person of Jesus today than I was one year ago?
2. As a result of the answer to question No. 1, are those in my sphere of influence coming to know Christ as Lord and Savior?
Those brave enough to do so might ask themselves “How would those closest to me answer these questions about me?”
Intellectual Fitness
Leaders are learners. They are always seeking to grow, to sharpen their skills, and to expand their knowledge. Sometimes this takes the form of the continuation of a formal education. However, more often than not, it is about gaining knowledge through exposure to key people, other ministries, and reading.
I have heard Bill Hybels say many times, when asked about his advice to leaders who want to get better at leading: “Lead something, anything, get around people who are better leaders than you are and read books on leadership.” As a result of the Master’s Program, I made a commitment to read at least forty books a year on a variety of subjects, including, but not limited to, theology, marriage and family, leadership, and history. This commitment has yielded a rich reservoir from which I can draw in leading the multiple tribes for which I am responsible.
Learning leaders, when around other leaders, do more listening than talking, always asking strategic questions. The answers to these questions help them do a better job of leading their own tribes.
Relational Fitness
All church tribe leaders need close Christian friends. Proverbs 27:17 says, “Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another.” In Ecclesiastes 4:9 the writer reminds us, “Two are better than one because they have a good reward for their efforts.”
For some reason this seems to be, as a rule, a greater deficiency in male leaders than in female leaders. Perhaps this is because our culture, at least in America, highly regards independence and self-reliance. Perhaps what keeps us from this healthy interdependence is our pride or a desire for secrecy to hide our besetting sins.
The truth is that we all have blind spots, which, if left unaddressed, will, at best, limit our effectiveness as leaders and, at worst, potentially shipwreck our lives and cause us to become disqualified. As Christian leaders, we are always talking to others about the importance of community and accountability. Do we believe in the biblical concepts enough to model them in our own lives? Two questions:
1. Are you currently in a small group of believers where you are not the leader or supervising the other participants?
2. Are there one or two (same-gender) individuals with whom you meet on a regular basis, who know your strengths, weaknesses, besetting sins, and tendencies, and who currently have permission to ask you the tough questions, and if necessary, be rude to you for Christ’s sake?
Physical Fitness
This one is harder to fake. I can pretend to be spiritually, intellectually, and relationally fit, but when I step on the scales, the numbers do not lie. Yes, this body—this temporary tent—is going to be put in the ground one day and return to dust. But until that glorious day, it is the vehicle in which we dwell as we lead our tribe. If we do not get adequate exercise, eat the right fuel, and get enough sleep, we handicap our effectiveness as leaders in at least two ways.
First, we limit the amount of energy available for the energy-demanding role of a tribal leader. For more on this, I recommend The Power of Full Engagement, by Jim Loehr and Tony Schwartz. The authors argue that managing energy—not time—is the key to high performance and personal renewal.
Second, when it becomes obvious to others that we are being poor stewards of our bodies, this hurts our credibility with those in the tribes we lead.
Parenting
According to the apostle Paul, one prerequisite for leadership in the church is effective leadership in one’s own home tribe. He writes, “If anyone does not know...
