Roses in Concrete

Giving Foster Children the Future They Deserve

Andre Chapman

• Publisher: Diamond Kane Publishing
• Year: 2020
• ISBN:
  9780996686914
• Topic: Ciencias sociales
• Subtopic: Sociología

André Chapman left his lucrative Silicon Valley career in high-tech sales to work full time in the field of foster care. Some questioned that move. But twenty-five years later, Unity Care Group, the organization he founded and directs, serves thousands of foster children and families, while stimulating revolutionary improvements in the fields of foster care and public education.

Through these pages, you will be:

Encouraged by this man’s remarkable story of courage, faith, and vision.

Challenged by his innovative ideas for transforming our broken educational and foster-care systems.

Inspired by his devotion to bringing hope to the hopeless while growing “roses in concrete.”

What can you do to carry this message and also make a difference?

CHAPTER 1

LOST LUGGAGE

As I looked out from my seat on the dais at the filled-to-capacity grand ballroom of the prestigious San Jose Fairmont Hotel, I was overwhelmed with gratitude. Around the scores of circular banquet tables in front of me were seated more than 350 citizens and community leaders who had come together to celebrate twenty years of service by Unity Care, the organization I had founded in 1993 to promote better foster care in the San Francisco Bay area.

This black-tie “YouthLive!” gala promised to be both entertaining and uplifting. In addition to hearing inspiring speeches, we would be witnessing the remarkable talents of some of the youths in our program as performers, artists, and fashion designers. Our logo for the event was the mythical Sankofa bird of West Africa. Its forward-facing body and backward-looking head perfectly expressed our goal for the evening. We wanted to glance back at the road we’d traveled, so we could more clearly see the road ahead.

The Sankofa Bird
Sankofa is an African word from the Akan tribe in Ghana. The literal translation of the word and the symbol is, “It is not taboo to fetch what is at risk of being left behind.”

In my speech, I planned to acknowledge that the prior twenty years had not been easy. More than once we had wondered if we would have the funds to survive to the next day. The journey had been made more difficult by bureaucratic systems and antiquated laws, which hurt foster children more than they help them.

But I was confident that God had called me to this endeavor, and over the years He had always faithfully, and sometimes miraculously, provided for our needs. Among the faces in the audience, I recognized many that belonged to youths and families who had been part of our programs. We had made an effort to locate these graduates and get them back for this special occasion. As part of looking back, we wanted to hear their stories about how Unity Care had impacted their lives. The walls of our administrative offices are covered with photos of youths enjoying summer picnics, playing basketball, working on community service projects, and participating in other fun activities. Whenever graduates of our program come back for a visit, they always look for their own photos on these walls.

How different that is from the circumstances of most children in the foster care system who drift from home to home with their belongings in plastic bags. Many have no photos or fond memories of their childhood or adolescent years.

State Senator Jim Beall presenting Unity Care with a certificate of commendation.

The first speaker this evening was State Senator Jim Beall. A strong advocate for Unity Care over the years, he said many kind words and presented the organization with a commendation from the California State General Assembly.

Patrick Willis, the all-star linebacker for the San Francisco 49ers and the honorary chairman of the event, then told the audience about his life as a foster child. One set of caring foster parents had nurtured him and his two siblings from youth to adulthood. Few kids who come through foster care are so fortunate.

Lots of people told me I was crazy to leave a successful career in high-tech software sales to enter the non-profit sector. When I resigned my position as a highly paid executive with a Silicon Valley company to go full-time with Unity Care, I left almost $1 million of stock options on the table.

When I’m asked how I found the courage to leave that kind of money and job security behind, I always answer that the fulfillment that comes from pursuing one’s passion is worth whatever sacrifices are necessary. I have never regretted that decision.

...the fulfillment that comes from pursuing one’s passion is worth whatever sacrifices are necessary.

The large crowd assembled for this 20th anniversary celebration was one more testimony to how God had honored my obedience to His call on my life. It was also a reminder that I was merely the pilot, and that Unity Care was truly a collective effort.

A Moving Address

After Patrick Willis finished his remarks, I introduced Makel Ali, the evening’s keynote speaker. As this young African American made his way up to the podium, dressed in a suit and tie and appearing confident, I thought back to how disheartened he had looked twenty years before, when he was the fifth youth we accepted into our program.

Makel Ali (left), Patrick Willis, and the author at YouthLive!

“My name is Makel Ali, and I know what it’s like to wake up in a children’s shelter,” he began.

“It’s an awful gut-wrenching feeling to wake up one day at the tender age of fourteen and realize that no one in this world seems to care if you even exist. And that was just the harsh reality facing me one summer morning in 1993, while being housed in the Santa Clara County Children’s Shelter. This was not my first morning waking up in an orphanage. No, not even close. Unfortunately for me, by age fourteen I had become a seasoned veteran of sleeping on uncomfortable, worn, and tattered cots, eating at assembly-line-like feedings, and going through the revolving doors of one failed placement after another. Yes, by fourteen, ‘hope’ was just an empty four-letter word that seemed to live in some far-off, desolate town that no airport or bus station sold tickets to get to.”

It’s an awful gut-wrenching feeling to wake up one day at the tender age of fourteen and realize that no one in this world seems to care if you even exist.

I glanced out over the sea of people seated around the banquet tables. All eyes were riveted on Makel. He continued.

“One morning while I was sitting around in the boy’s barracks trying my best to get through another long and uneventful day in the shelter, I was summoned to the front desk to take a call that had come in for me. I wondered who could be on the other end of that phone. What if it was my mom calling to say she had finally broken free from her cage of addiction and selfishness and was on her way to come pick me up? Or better yet, maybe it was my dad who had gotten wind of his son’s abandonment and would rather die before letting me suffer through another day of feeling unwanted.

“It was neither of these things, but it did turn out to be a day that changed my life. It was the day that André Chapman invited me to come and live at Unity Care. Over the next four years, the staff at Unity Care gave me the tools to rebuild my life one brick at a time. They helped me mortar it together on a foundation of love, respect, integrity, responsibility, and education. They taught me valuable lessons about life and how to be a man. It was a breath of fresh air for this kid who had always felt inferior because of the color of his skin.”

Many of the African Americans in the audience were nodding, indicating that they personally identified with these sentiments. Makel continued.

“At Unity Care, education was the glue that held the program together. It was non-negotiable. Once when André learned that I had missed two English classes, he removed me from a football game. I can still remember his words that day as he walked onto the football field looking every bit like a disgruntled parent. He said, ‘You must have thought I was joking when I said you couldn’t play. You may hate me now, but one day you’ll grow to appreciate what I am doing. And Makel, I’m going to get you into college, if it’s the last thing that I do.’ College: what a concept! Did African Americans even go to college? Not in my house. Not in my neighborhood. Where I was from, success was not determined by college units, credits, or degrees, but rather by prison sentences, bullet wounds, and drug sales. But with countless hours of mentoring, by the time I graduated from Unity Care, I was accepted into eight universities.”

At Unity Care, education was the glue that held the program together. It was non-negotiable.

This remark brought forth spontaneous applause from the audience. When it had subsided, Makel resumed speaking.

“But things did not go as I had planned. Back then, Unity Care didn’t offer the Independent Living Program or the Transitional Housing Program it has today to keep graduates off the street while they’re attending college. So, while most other students at my college were worried about finishing term papers or choosing a fraternity, I was making life decisions about which park bench, back seat, or men’s shelter I would be sleeping in that evening. After two semesters of juggling school and homelessness, I came to the painful realization that college wasn’t for me, and I reluctantly dropped out.

“After several years of going from pillar to post, I began to lose hope. I was working at a dead-end job at some drab warehouse when I got a phone call. The voice on the other end was familiar. It was André. He wanted to know if I would like to come home to Unity Care, this time as a counselor. I accepted his job offer, and I’ve now worked at Unity Care for six years. People often ask me, ‘Why are you so successful at counseling youth?’ My answer is simple: I have experienced their hurt and pain firsthand. I have walked miles in their shoes, and I have literally slept in their beds.”

At this point, many in the audience were wiping away tears. Makel turned and looked directly at me.

“André, you once told me, ‘You, Makel, are a winning lotto ticket, a rose in the concrete. The world gave you rotten lemons, and you managed to make some of the sweetest lemonade. You have beaten everyone who has beaten you. I am proud to call you son.’”

You, Makel, are a winning lotto ticket, a rose in the concrete.

“When you said those words to me, André, I could not muster up a response, because it took everything within me to hold back my tears. So, I want to say this to you today: I was once a young boy who was treated like a lost piece of luggage, and you claimed me. I was once a young man who was broken by the heavy weight of the foster care system, and you fixed me. I was once an irresponsible adult, and you still believed in me. Because of you, I stand before this crowd today—a man full of hope, integrity, spirituality, and a sense of worth. Because of you, I’m a loving husband with aspirations to be a proud father and soon-to-be college graduate. André, you are the father I often dreamed about when I would lie awake as a child in the shelter. So, if you have never heard this before, let it be clear tonight: It’s from the top of my head to the bottom of my feet that I say, ‘Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!’”

The entire audience rose and gave Makel a standing ovation. There were no dry eyes, including mine. It was one of the most moving experiences of my life. I am relating Makel’s speech not to glorify my role in his life, or even to promote Unity Care, but simply because I think his testimony is the best way to explain why I am writing this book.

There are hundreds of thousands of abandoned kids like Makel looking for mothers and fathers who will never come. The foster care system is broken, and most of those kids bounce from home to home, like lost luggage that will never be claimed. It has been my joy and honor to be a father figure to many of them, and to help provide a safe, nurturing environment for many more. I’m writing this book because I want to encourage others to join me in this noble, fulfilling, and vital cause.

The foster care system is broken, and most of those kids bounce from home to home, like lost luggage that will never be claimed.

CHAPTER 2

STRADDLING TWO WORLDS

I grew up in Palo Alto, California, the “Mecca of Technology,” in the heart of Silicon Valley. Back then, in the 1970s, the population was 90 percent white and 2 percent African American. I was a 2-percenter in torn blue jeans, surrounded by kids in blue blazers.

I was a 2-percenter in torn blue jeans, surrounded by kids in blue blazers.

A hundred feet across the freeway from Palo Alto lies East Palo Alto. The two communities...

Table of contents

• Cover
• Title Page
• Copyright Page
• Dedication
• Table of Contents
• Acknowledgments
• Foreword
• Preface
• Chapter 1. Lost Luggage
• Chapter 2. Straddling Two Worlds
• Chapter 3. Seeing More Clearly
• Chapter 4. Juggling Priorities
• Chapter 5. Reordering Priorities
• Chapter 6. All In
• Chapter 7. Breaking Up Is Hard
• Chapter 8. Closing the Door
• Chapter 9. Fixing the System
• Chapter 10. Engaging Communities of Color
• Chapter 11. Battles on the Homefront
• Chapter 12. Building a Village
• Chapter 13. Opportunities and Challenges
• Chapter 14. A Whole New Level
• Chapter 15. Expanding Our Footprint
• Chapter 16. Looking To The Future
• Footnotes
• About Unity Care
• About the Author