Act Two One
Downing Street
Lloyd George, Churchill, Collins and Griffith approach the table. Griffith distributes a document. The diagram appears.
McKenna It is time for Mr Griffith to present President de Valeraâs proposal for âexternal associationâ.
Griffith does so in dumb show, Jones speaking over him.
Jones The Irish have a natural appreciation of the rich ambiguity of the English language . . . But I confess, even the Celt in me flounders amidst the finessing they bring to the question of âassociationâ.
Griffith has finished. Silence around the table. The British look at each other and at the document.
Lloyd George Mr Griffith. Will you. Take. An oath. To the Crown?
Griffith We will . . . accept the Crown as the . . . bond of association.
Lloyd George The âbondâ of association?
Griffith We will . . . adhere to the Commonwealth.
Churchill What do you mean by âadheringâ?
Lloyd George You mean membership? Allegiance?
Collins Not quite.
Griffith We should be associated with the Commonwealth â outside of that, we would be a free people.
Lloyd George I wish you to be a free people â
Griffith Excellent. We are / agreed then . . .
Lloyd George and to freely choose to enter the Empire.
Collins Itâs not a free choice if the alternative is war.
Churchill The alternative to a truce is always war.
Lloyd George So you do not accept the link with the Crown?
Griffith We would accept it as head of the association.
Churchill As mere âalliesâ?
Griffith More than that â
Collins Permanent allies, not temporary.
Lloyd George But not as members of the Empire?
Collins No.
Griffith But we would have representation at the Imperial Conference and would accept its decision in matters of common concern.
Churchill So you would not be a member of the Empire but would attend the Empireâs conference and accept its decisions?
Griffith In matters of common concern.
Lloyd George What are matters of âcommon concernâ?
Griffith Large matters.
Churchill War?
Collins And peace.
Griffith Trade.
Lloyd George So you want to leave the trade association that is the Commonwealth, but accept its rules on trade.
Griffith Well, that would be the / essence of our proposal.
Churchill It sounds to me rather like you want to have your cake and eat it.
Griffith I confess, Iâve never quite understood that phrase: surely, by definition, if you are eating cake, you are having it?
Jones I believe the phrase used be âeat your cake and have itâ â in the sense of âhaveâ meaning to possess, to keep.
Collins NĂ thig a bheith ag feadaĂl agus ag ithe mine.
Lloyd George What?
Griffith In Irish. âYou canât whistle and eat porridgeâ.
Jones Ah! Thatâs like the Welsh proverb â
Churchill I think we are losing sight of the problem â
Collins Hereâs the problem: you people came to our country, and you stole all our fucking cake.
Lloyd George We digress. (Addressing the document.) Can you change âfree partnership with the British Commonwealthâ to âfree partnership within the British Commonwealthâ?
Griffith But that would mean Ireland being prepared to enter the Commonwealth â we are prepared to associate with it, not enter it.
Lloyd George Can you change âa recognition of the Crownâ to ârecognition of the Crownâ?
Griffith But that would imply allegiance â we are offering simply a form of recognition.
Churchill (impatient) You mean to say you will go to war over an indefinite article?
Collins (irritated) Will you?
Tea is brought in.
Lloyd George Ah, a timely interlude, I think.
Griffith No, thank you.
Lloyd George Mr Collins.
Collins No. Thank you.
Lloyd George But / you donât mean to say that youâre still bound by . . .
Griffith We canât.
Lloyd George I realise that the delegation has instructions / from Dublin . . .
Griffith We have undertaken to accept no hospitality while in Britain.
Churchill Itâs a cup of tea!
Lloyd George Perhaps we should have offered you cake.
Griffith We are not here as your guests. We are here / as plenipotentia...